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Friday, May 31, 2019

It Is a Crazy Game

It Is a Crazy Game

 GOLF…that’s right ladies this is about golf.  It’s OK, you can leave, I understand, except you Patti, I expect you to stick around.

Today was my first day of the year to play.  There have been other days, but with the rain, not many.  Plus, I need some practice before actually teeing up on the first hole. 

I had it in my head to not even keep score, but that never really happens, you always know what your score is.  I figured I’d be satisfied with a 54.  No, I’m not that good, I generally only play 9 holes.  Nine holes walking and dragging a cart is enough for me, especially early in the season.


I was playing pretty well.  Stayed out of trouble, kept the ball on the course, short game was all right and even some bad shots found the green.  After the first four holes, the toughest on this nine, I was on track to shoot 54.

Mind you 54 is not good, my “par” for 9 holes is 45 or one over "real par" on every hole.  Still, first day out I was happy.

Then I parred the par three 5th, and the par 5 sixth.  Missed putts on the next two holes still got me a five and a four. 

Some quick math in my head and Holy Cow, if I just bogey the last hole I’ll make 45. 

Here is where golf can be such a crazy game.

My drive headed for a pond, but with the wet fairways and little roll, it stopped short.  My next shot cleared the water but was left of the green, and I thought short.

I could not find that ball. 

A bright orange ball lost in the rough.  I was not going to take all day, so I dropped a new ball around where I thought it should be.  No penalty, my rules…pretty sure if this were “The Masters” the spectators would have found the ball.  It was not in deep rough.

Anyway, I still had a tough 60 yards to the green.  I dropped a very nice wedge 12 feet from the hole.  An almost certain bogey and a 45 score, with an outside chance of par and a 44.

Walking to the hole I spied my lost orange ball, twenty yards further than I thought. 

“Oh crap.”  I was behind a sand trap.  Clearing the trap and holding the green from the angle I was on would be difficult. 

I tried to pop up a high short shot, but it was too short, landing in the sand trap.


From a sure bogey and 45 to a probable six or maybe worse.  

I do not play traps well.  There is nowhere to practice them on this course and the sand conditions differ from hole to hole.  I know how to get out, but this shot would land down hill and perhaps run forever.

“CRAP, I wish I’d never found the damn ball!”

So, I climbed in the trap, dug in and gave the ball a firm sand trap splash of a hit.  The ball flew out softly, hit the down hill slope and ran ever so slowly toward the hole, and it kept moving, stopping just short and slightly left of the hole…and then plopped in.

PAR!!  A 44 score.

I came home ecstatic.  Mrs. C asked how was my game was?  I told her in great detail right down to the miracle shot.

“That’s nice, where do you want to go to dinner?”

That is why I am posting this.  I had to tell someone!

It is a crazy game. 


  1. It’s rounds like that that keep you coming back.

  2. Well done JoeH. Wives should be more supporting of their husband's golf prowess.

    It was about 11:30pm last night when suddenly my wife shouted, "Golf ... Golf ... Golf ... That's all you speak about. That's all you do. Golf ... Always golf!"

    I tell you. It was out of the blue, and I was startled out of my life. I never expected to see her on the golf course at that time of night. I was practising quietly and there she was. Shouting at the top of her voice.

    God bless.

  3. So where did you go to dinner?

  4. That's wonderful! Keep you coming back all season, I bet. . .

    I've played one nine-hole round of golf in my life, on the morning of my buddy's wedding, when he took us groomsmen out for a round to kill time until the wedding. I shot 58 (with a birdie!), and I get so many compliments for, "That's pretty darn good for the only round you've played in your life!" and I figure it can only get worse from here. . .

  5. Ok so I may as well have been reading Russian �� The only thing I know about golf is to keep the car windows shut when we drive through the golf club near us. I'm glad I read to the end though because your excitemnt was palpable and it made me feel happy for you. I have no idea what you did - but well done!

  6. Look out for Even Steven next time you play. Such success must be buffered, to keep the earth spinning on its axis.

  7. Hahahaha. Yep... So what's for dinner???

  8. So, where did you go for dinner?

  9. That is what keeps golfers coming back, that one miracle hole that was totally skill. Really makes your day doesn't it?

  10. Well done, and well told, Joe. Congratulations! AND for that nice Italian restaurant.

  11. Congratulations! The stars lines up in your favor.

  12. It's probably only a crazy game to those who don't appreciate the skill involved.

  13. This post reminds of me listening to my Mom speak Greek. I don't understand a word but I enjoy listening to her anyway!

  14. oh so finally YOU DID IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    thank you for dragging us to your golf ground

    it was amazing to watch this match through your special narration :)

    thoroughly enjoyed it SPECIALLY THE LAST MIRACULOUS SHOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    i can feel your excitement !

    when i was a little girl i found this game really interesting
    first i liked it because it was played on green meadow then i began to enjoy it

    it was so annoying when ball was stopped so close to hole but yet not drop in it

  15. I would have exactly the same response as your spouse. My son-in-law is big on golf and actually heading to that famous Saint something or other in Scotland which he reserved almost two years ago!!!

  16. Spaghetti is really good at Italian restaurants! :-p