Sometimes You Can Tell
A Book By It’s Cover
We just
finished watching the movie “Powder” for the third time. It is a very good movie. At the end I asked Mrs. C,
“Who wrote this, it seems sort of
Stephen Kingish?”
I Googled it
and up popped a picture of the writer. (see above)
“That can’t be the writer, he looks
creepy in a child molester way.”
“I Agree.”
Turns out it
was the writer and further research finds he was accused of molesting a 12-year-old
in a previous movie production.
Now I admit
that every creepy looking person is not a creep. Every dangerous looking person is not a
threat. Every pleasant looking person is
not nice and every trustworthy looking person is not trustworthy.
But.
More often
than not we can tell a book by it’s cover.
Somewhere
along life’s road we all meet people and recognize non-verbal indicators of character. Dress,
demeanor, facial expressions, body language, voice intonations, even odor, all
things we subliminally learn that are indications of character.
Sometimes
the cover is wrong.
Often people
learn to adapt to characteristics which will fool us. The “nice” person is not always nice. The “trustworthy” person is not always
trustworthy. Sometimes the “intelligent”
person is dumb as a stump and sometimes the dope is smart as a whip.
More often
than not, though, it seems to me you can tell a book by it’s cover, and sometimes you
should think twice before pulling it off the shelf.
I have also
learned that women, perhaps because they are often more vulnerable, are especially
adept at reading the cover. When Mrs.
Cranky feels an instinct kick in, I listen.
Years ago, I
visited a doctor for a kidney stone issue.
“Gee he seems like a nice guy.”
“I think he is creepy.”
“Really? I didn’t see it.”
“That’s because you’re a guy.”
On the
second visit, I did pick up a creepy vibe and the third visit was to a
different doctor in the same office. When
we requested the change, the receptionist gave Mrs. C a glance that I did not
notice.
“See, I told you he was creepy.”
“What?”
“Didn’t you see the receptionist's
look? You're not the first patient to
ask for a different doctor.”
“I didn’t see it.”
“Of course, you didn’t.”
It's always good to listen to your instincts and your wife's too if she picks up on something. I know several almost strangers I'd happily entrust with small children and others I'll cross the road to avoid at all costs since even talking to them makes me uneasy.
ReplyDeleteI rely on instinct rather than looks. I thought it was the case with most women but from news items I think I must be wrong.
ReplyDeleteUsually, we never find out if our creepy vibe feeling was correct, but once you're proved right, you realize you should trust your instinct.
ReplyDeleteI do think women generally have a better developed intuitive sense about others and perhaps it is a survival instinct kind of thing that we need more than men.
ReplyDeleteIn our house it's the hubs who has the ability to discern lack of character....I seem to be blind to the whole thing.
ReplyDeleteSometimes you just know, it’s something about the eyes.
ReplyDeleteI seem to have inherited the ability from my dad to tell if someone is cheating on their spouse/partner. I can't even tell you exactly how I know, but I can just tell most of the time. Early on hubby wouldn't believe me sometimes when I'd say s/he's cheating on him/her about someone we knew. Over the years, though, he has learned that I'm almost always right about it.
ReplyDeleteI think it's smart to go with your gut/instinct/intuition/whatever you want to call it about someone. Even if you can't articulate what it is, there's something that's setting the alarm bells off.
My family is a bunch of Greek tea leaf readers...and a few palm readers. I've can usually tell a person pretty quickly after meeting them what kind of character they are. I've gotten a bit more cynical as I've aged so I try to make sure it's not just me with a bad attitude! Anyway, you are so right, you can usually tell a book by it's cover. (I think I might have to change my Facebook profile pic..)
ReplyDeleteSome people give off certain vibes and some of us pick up on it easier than others.
ReplyDeleteIt definitely pays to listen to your creep-dar. If you are wrong--no harm unless you have sic'ed the cops on an innocent person but if you are right--harm spared.
ReplyDeleteMom always told me to go with your gut feeling when meeting someone for the first time because 9 times out of 10 your gut feeling is correct, and you are 100% right in that women pick up on things like this quicker than we do, you are smart to listen to Mrs C.
ReplyDeleteYou know how you can get a whiff, and the smell gives you a complete setting? Sometimes I glance at someone and get a kind of scenario about what they've been up to. It's usually not something good. I know it's my overactive imagination, but it makes me feel like that Johnny Smith character in The Dead Zone.
ReplyDeleteWe are so oblivious.
ReplyDeleteEasy there big fella, I'm one of those creepy-looking-but-not-creepy fellers. So far nearly every creep I've known directly does not look like a creep, with one glaring exception. Anyone who looks like anything can be a creep, it don't take no look.
ReplyDeleteSorry, this is a bit of a hot-button for me. I had to quit working in a youth group years ago when a true teen creep used my looks/demeanor against me to falsely accuse me. He did not look creepy at all but his true nature eventually ended with him being kicked out of one of our military academies (his life-long dream) at which point he started to study .... to be a doctor. Fortunately for the world, that didn't pan out in the end.
I have a hard time "reading" people. It seems I could be one of those women who referred to Jeffrey Dahmer as the "quiet nice young man next door." Hahahaha.
ReplyDeleteI've found that people have a hard time reading me, too. Sometimes people think I'm really smart (I'm not). And one time a mediator at work said he'd hate to play poker with me.