Dinner at IHOP
Mrs. C has
forever been trying to get me to eat at IHOP (Formerly knows as International
House of Pancakes). I have sworn that I would
not eat at a pancake house.
Why she has
been intent on me joining her to this restaurant is beyond me. Twice I have almost gone for breakfast, but
the parking lot was full and people were waiting outside…no thanks.
“We should go for a dinner.”
“Why, who wants pancakes for dinner?”
“They don’t just have pancakes, they
have sandwiches, burgers, fries and other stuff.”
“You mean like a diner?”
“Yeah, and you like diners.”
“Yes, I do, so why not go to a diner
instead of a pancake house that is like a diner.”
“You’re a jerk!”
Now while
that may be true, keep in mind that New Jersey is famous for three things;
miles of seashore, gangsters, and diners.
No state has more great diners than New Jersey. Why would I eat at a pancake house that is like a diner when our state is famous
for diners? I might as well go to Pizza
Hut for crappy fake cardboard pizza, instead of Vinny’s genuine fantastic
pizza.
Well we went
to a movie the other day, and afterwards I agreed to try IHOP as it was right
across the street. It was worth it, not
for the food which was ok, but for the conversation. Not conversation with Mrs. C which was ok, but
for the conversation of the couple in the next booth.
There was a
lady who was somewhere between 30 and 75…hard to tell, and with a look that
suggested she had more cats than the health code might allow. I will only give you a gist of the
conversation which was impossible to not hear.
“Know why I wore this
coat and not my other raincoat? I have
two coats you know”
It took
about five minutes of this questioning before finally getting to the answer.
“The other coat is dry
clean only. Why dry clean only? Won’t it get wet in the rain?”
For the next
ten minutes all we heard was a repeat of the rain question in different
forms. I heard the term “dry
clean only” about a thousand times.
“Why dry clean only? Won’t
it get wet in the rain? Dry clean only,
I don’t understand. If it gets dirty I
don’t want to have to have it dry cleaned, but it is dry clean only.”
I can’t
repeat the whole conversation, but you get the picture. We both tried to edit out her voice, which
was, by the way, an annoying nasal combination of Jersey and Boston with more
than a pinch of stupid.
At some
point we no longer heard “dry clean only” but our ears perked
up at this gem,
“I think I need a
shower, I haven’t had one since Atlantic City, just after the snow storm.”
The snow
storm was eight days ago.
To which Mrs.
C and I both whispered at the same time,
“Maybe she is ‘dry clean only!’”
IHOP; the
food at a Jersey diner is better, but you cannot top the entertainment.
Loved this... you actually got me laughing out loud. How on earth did you manage to keep your cool, or did you?
ReplyDeleteI have about as much interest in going to IHOP as I do to Waffle House.
ReplyDeleteHmm, auditory voyeurism at IHOP, was that Mrs. C's intention?
ReplyDeleteI think IHOP is pretty good. Maybe that's because Texas is NOT known for their great diners.
ReplyDeletePriceless! IHOP does serve up a good breakfast, just go early or for brunch.
ReplyDeleteOoooh.....I'll pass thanks on both the IHop and the conversation. I would have been pulling my hair out by the time we left and I really can't afford to lose any more hair.
ReplyDeleteYou're right the food is alright, but your entertainments was priceless. I don't think I could have kept a straight face.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day. ☺
Just an added random thought, I assume some coats are treated to repel rain and soap and water may hurt the coating, that said, in 70 years, I have never had or ever needed to clean a rain coat nor known anyone who has washed a rain coat, dry clean or otherwise. You put them on, go someplace, and then hang them up...where are they getting dirty?
ReplyDeleteI had a pigeon poop on my rain coat in NYC.
DeleteI love pancakes, I don't think we have large chains of pancake houses but I'm sure we have small pancake eateries. I'm nosy so I would have evesdropped on the conversation.
ReplyDeleteI haven't eaten at IHOP, but now I want to. Especially if you are there to attract the weirdos, which will keep them away from me.
ReplyDeleteI've only ever had plastic raincoats for the kids when they were school age, and they did get grubby, so got run through the washer after each winter. Now I have a wind-proof, shower-proof parka that is very warm to wear and keeps me dry unless the rain is so heavy I shouldn't be out in it, but it is also washable and gets a spin in the washer after every winter. Perhaps her dry clean only coat is similar to our Australian "DryZ-A-Bone, an oil treated fabric that repels water and should only be sponged off with clear water if it gets muddy, as they so often do when being worn by Drovers in the outback.
ReplyDeleteDebby doesn't do pancakes at any meal. Unless they are swedish pancakes. I do like omelettes.
ReplyDeleteWe don't have many diners around my part of California. We do have many IHOPs and Dennys and yes, the conversation in the booths are the REAL REASON why you go to these places.
I don't like pancakes, but I do like omelettes, so that's what I get when we go to IHOP. Clearly I should pay more attention to my surroundings there!
ReplyDelete