STUPID HEADINES 012118
It’s time
again for
And every day of every year
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and
my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
______________________________
Black
Death spread by humans, vindicating rats – I
think this is coming several hundred years late, I suspect rats will seek
damages for liable.
Counterfeit cash circulating in 11
states: Here’s how to spot it – Number 1. Trump is not
on the twenty-dollar bill…yet.
People in California face misdemeanor
charges for feeding the homeless – I’m sure there is a reason for this law, but there must be a
better solution…seems a bit harsh to me.
Traveler arrested at airport for
wearing too many clothes – Playboy International has very strict rules.
Michael Douglas preemptively denies
masturbation allegations – He’s not blind, but he does wear glasses.
Tom Brady injures throwing hand ahead
of AFC Championship – They could Gillooley him and Brady will still be behind center this week
and he will still be great…which pisses me off!
New Oregon law says motorists can
pump their gas – Oh crap! If New
Jersey does this I’ll be lost.
Rural women having sex earlier than
women in the city – City
women are more active at night?
Five-foot long tapeworm came
'wiggling out' of man's body after he ate sushi – So, to get rid of a tapeworm, eat
sushi.
$6 million in chips stolen in Wynn
casino heist – Bet
you can’t take just one.
And this week’s gift
from Florida:
Man tries to order Taco Bell from
drive-thru bank teller, gets arrested for DUI – Apparently the Taco Bell drive-thru
clerk didn’t complain when he made a deposit.
FEEL -GOOD STORY OF THE
WEEK:
Pope Francis marries couple in
impromptu ceremony aboard papal plane – I don’t know much about the Pope, but this makes him pretty
cool in my book.
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Come back again next week for more
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
Another reason for me to avoid flying, i wear too many clothes (layers and layers) because i get cold so easily.
ReplyDeleteGreat story about the Pope!
It's illegal to feed the homeless here, too. It's to encourage them to go to shelters.
ReplyDeleteDunno. The ordinance makes less sense than most of your headlines.
I about spit out my coffee when I read this weeks gift from Florida, I try not to order Taco Bell from Taco Bell either.
ReplyDeleteI saw the Pope Francis story on our news, that was a really great thing he did for that couple, and something they will always remember.
Didn't Tom Brady sport a walking boot before one super bowl and there was nothing wrong with his foot? Me thinks Belichick is at it again with misdirection.
ReplyDeleteIn California there are laws upon laws and if they don't like federal government laws, they make laws that let you ignore federal laws. We are a special kind of stupid here.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day, Joe. ☺
Floriday seems to be a never ending source of stupidity.....must be something in the water.
ReplyDeleteSince I spend winters in Florida, I want to let you know that Florida cited people for feeding sandwiches to the homeless last winter. Just don't want California to get more points in the stupid department!
ReplyDeleteOf course, you can't 100% believe what the headlines say.In regards to California feeding the homeless. This is not a state law. These are either city or county ordinances. However this past summer a church was coming to the park handing out clothing and food. They did this a few times, leaving all the mess for city workers to clean up. Old dirty clothing was thrown in the Sacramento river, along with garbage. The city then revoked their permit. Then the church gets on media and cries like a (Sacramento) river. There's always more than meets the eye and our homeless here are not like homeless in other areas. MOst are former felons, Brown let out of the jails. The good homeless know where to get services and they do not litter or take dumps in the street and sidewalks.
ReplyDeleteAnyway,just needed to clear that up.
Heh, heh! The bra and Michael Douglas and those rural women had my 13-year-old self snorting with glee, and hypothesizing whether Tom Brady might have Michael-Douglased his own hand.
ReplyDeleteWe live in a strange and wonderful place.
ReplyDeleteOregon CAN pump their own gas???? Hardly any stations have had service for years and years, around here.
ReplyDeletei agree with watson
ReplyDeletethanks for smiles Joe!
Tapeworm came wiggling out of a man's body...? I'm not sure I even want to think about that.
ReplyDelete