Tuesday, February 21, 2017
Why I Dawdle
Why I Dawdle
I dawdle a lot. Mrs. C is often upset with me because of this.
“Would you get moving, we're late. Why do you always dawdle?”
Actually, my dawdling is a subconscious act. I do not intentionally dawdle, it is my subconscious saying I am forgetting something. I may get half way out of the door but my mind tells me, “Slow down, you’re forgetting something.” “What,” I ask my subconscious mind. “I don’t know, just slow down.” “Well this is ridiculous, I’m late and Mrs. C is getting pissed.” “OK, but you are forgetting something.”
“Are you coming, why must you always dawdle?”
“OK, I’m coming, WAIT, my cell phone charger cord, my phone is almost dead!” “See, I knew you were forgetting something.”
And that is why I dawdle. It is also why I am often late. I just about get out the door and I think I am forgetting something. Sometimes I am, and dawdling pays off. Sometimes my subconscious mind is wrong. “Wait, you are forgetting something.” “I don’t think so.” “I think you are, you better dawdle and go through the check list.”
This is where I stop and start to pat down all my pockets to see what I’ve forgotten. “Back left pocket…wallet: CHECK. Back right pocket…handkerchief: CHECK. Left front pocket…bill fold: CHECK. Right front pocket…cell phone: CHECK. Jacket pocket…car keys: CHECK. Shirt pocket…Cigarettes: NO! Wait idiot, you stopped smoking years ago. OK subconscious, shut up.”
Right or wrong, my subconscious always makes me late. Sometimes even after I go through the check list I forget something.
“You’re forgetting something!” “I don’t think so, I’ve gone through the check list, I have everything and I’m late.” “OK, if you’re sure.”
I have gone to the gym without socks, or a shirt, or even my gym bag altogether. I’ve gone bowling without my bowling ball, left for the golf course without golf shoes or extra balls, taken the train without my monthly ticket or arrived at work without my ID badge (the last two before retirement). “I told you so!”
The check list doesn’t cover everything. Sometimes I just don’t dawdle enough.