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Saturday, December 22, 2012

Gotcha, Oops I’m Sorry

Gotcha, Oops I’m Sorry

My son, Matt, is a practical joker.  This Wednesday when I went to his home to toddler sit, he handed me a lottery ticket and a quarter as a scratch off tool.

“Here, this was supposed to be in your Christmas card” and he waited for me to scratch it off.  Instead I just said thanks and put it in my pocket for later.

When later came, Matt and Devon were upstairs putting the kids to bed.  I pulled out the ticket and started to scratch.  There were five Christmas trees to remove and reveal a dollar amount.  Match three dollar amounts and you are a winner.

I scratched off a $25, then a $10,000.  Damn, I was hoping for another $25 because no one ever wins $10,000.  I scratched off a $35, and another $10,000.  I scratched off the final tree knowing I had a loser and it came up $10,000.  I looked at it three times.  I think I just won $10,000, but I am always skeptical about stuff like this.

I went upstairs saying to myself, “I think I just won $10,000…this is very cool.  I can get Matt a giant TV for their new finished basement.  Mary Beth could use a grand, so could Mike.  I’ll put $1000 in Spencer’s college account, something for the step-cranks and Mrs. Cranky and I will be off to Aruba this February!”  I showed the ticket to Devon.

“Devon, tell me why I didn’t just win a bunch of money.”

Devon looked at the ticket.  “Oh my gosh…Matt look at this!”

Matt looked at the ticket.  “What does it say on the back?”

“I don’t know, even with glasses I can’t read the fine print.  You tell me.”

“Hmmm…it says if you match $1000 or less, bring the ticket to any Pa. Lottery Department for collection.  If your ticket say’s you have won  $10,000 jump up and down and yell yippee, then rip it up because this ticket was bought at 'Frank’s Gift and Novelty Shop' and you have been had!”

Well I was skeptical at first…but I was still disappointed.  It would have been so cool to win some “go crazy money” and I was looking forward to sharing the wealth; a Christmas to remember.  For years everyone would say, “Remember when Dad won the $10,000.”  It would have become part of Hagy lore.

Instead I laughed thinly and said, “Damn Matt, you got me good with that!”

Matt’s laugh was less robust than with his usual practical jokes. 

I really was not terribly upset that it was a joke, but there still must have been a pretty strong look of disappointment on my face.  Matt had expected me to do the scratch off in his presence so he could reveal the joke before I had spent the money in my head.

The next morning he told me he felt so bad about the joke that he couldn’t sleep.

GOOD!! Serves him right.

Shit…he can go buy his own TV!!

By the way Matt, I have a blog and I am not afraid to use it!


  1. Ouch! It seems it might be appropriate to get out all the buck naked baby pictures and potty training photos of little Matt and pass them around at the family Christmas gathering. ;)


  2. I like LOWANDSLOW's idea!!

  3. Good thought Scott and Fishducky, but Matt was #3 and we stopped taking pictures.

  4. I know what a #1 is...
    ...and a #2 [grins].

    What's a #3?

    Sorry, couldn't pass on that. Probably because I've been hanging out in this place too long.

    I like, "I have a blog and I'm not afraid to use it."

    My brother and some others know how that works.

  5. A joke that doesn't come off--jokeapolypse, so to speak. I feel bad for Matt.

  6. Yeah Matt, what your dad said. I would have been so upset. Oh well, at least you have a kidder in the family. They keep things interesting.

  7. That was kinda mean and I think your reaction perfectly understandable, but in his defense I don't think he meant to keep it going as long as it did. I guess you should cut him some slack.

  8. Not a fan of pranks. There are enough unpleasant moments in real life to use as "learning how to deal with disappointment" experiences without made up ones being involved.

    Merry Christmas, anyway!

  9. DANG Cranky that had to burn......Not nice but kind of funny

  10. I love your last line! My husband likes to play practical jokes and I warned him years ago never to pull this one on me, because I would cry uncontrollably for an uncomfortable period of time and he wouldn't get laid any time soon after such a mean trick.

    Unfortunately I don't think those tactics would be effective to prevent your son from doing this to you.