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Sunday, April 1, 2012

$650,000,000 DOWN THE DRAIN

$650,000,000 DOWN THE DRAIN
Well…$1.00 down the drain, but I was prepared to spend $650 million.

Mrs. Cranky bought a one dollar ticket for the record size lottery this week.  We did not win.  While we were waiting to lose, we discussed how we were going to spend the money. 

I suggested as multi (650) millionaires we would have to move from our comfortable but bourgeois townhouse.  Mrs. C disagreed.  We had our first fight in four years.

Mrs. C wanted to give large sums of money to brothers, sisters, children, grandchildren, neighbors and friends.  I disagreed.  We had our second real fight in four years.

Mrs. C wanted a vacation home on the Jersey Shore.  I wanted a palace in Bermuda.  We had our third real fight in four years.

I wanted a new car for everyday of the week.  Mrs. C said those cars would take up too much space in our bourgeois townhouse parking lot (I lost that fight) She wanted a giant SUV.  We had our fourth real fight in four years.

Fortunately we did not win the $650 million.  Our marriage could not have survived the pressure of spending all that money.

Personally, I think she wasted the one dollar on such a foolish pipe-dream. 

She wants to buy another ticket next week. 

We are now having our fifth real fight in the last four years.


  1. Oh Pal and I have Like to spend the jackpot lottery money as well - it can often get ugly. It's a good thing we don't often buy a ticket! For the record, I'd have been all for Bermuda!

  2. Bermuda is the place to be how can it even compare to the Jersey Shore????
    I never play but I am going to do it this week....why the hell not!

  3. we won a vacation for 10 in a luxury beachfront condo and a brand new I play those $1 rub offs, but only get another $1 rub off as the prize.

  4. With $650 million you could each do your own thing and still have money left over, couldn't you?

  5. I Agree with The Broad. You would certainly have enough to do both- why the argument? Unless that was the argument.


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