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Thursday, March 22, 2012

MY NEW LAPTOP

MY NEW LAPTOP


One day after I purchased my new laptop I turned on the machine and was greeted by a Microsoft message, “We are updating 1 of 49 programs; do not turn off your computer during this process.”  WTF? The computer was only one day old, why were there 49 programs that needed updating?

I wasn’t going to mess with Microsoft’s instructions so I left the computer alone even though I was anxious to play with my new toy.

Forty minutes later the last of the forty-nine updates were completed and I was instructed to restart the computer.  On the restart I was told to wait while files were reconfigured.  That message then disappeared and the screen did nothing, displayed nothing, and the little arrow was nowhere to be found.

Fifteen minutes later and there was no change.  Frustrated, I pushed the off button.  I turned the computer back on….still the screen did nothing displayed nothing and the arrow was still missing.

Mrs. Cranky, already tired of my whining (that's whinging for my UK and Aussie friends) about problems with the sensitive touchpad and not finding my files, sensed I was about to explode from frustration.

“Relax; I’m sure it is alright.”

“RELAX!!  The friggin fragging frumping thing is one day old and they got to mess with updating shit and now I got nothing!”

“It’s fine, just do a restart.”

“I friggin fraggin frumping did a power down and still it’s not responding.”

“Pull the power cord and remove the battery.”

I did as I was told, popping the battery out for three seconds and then powering up again.  Still the screen did not respond.  NOTHING!

“That’s it, I’m taking it to the “Geek Squad” and they better not have to send it away or I am going to freak out!”

“I’m coming with you.  When you go all rag ass on people they never help you out!”

We pulled in to Best Buy and headed straight for the Geek Squad desk.

“Can I help you?”

“Yes, I just bought this frumping machine yesterday.  This morning Microsoft updated forty-nine programs and the friggin fraggin frumping thing has not responded since.”

“Hmmm…can I try it?”

“Suit yourself” I said and handed the PC to the Geek.

He opened the laptop up and noted the lit-up non-responding screen.  He then pushed the off button, waited twenty seconds and pressed the power button again.

“We already did that.  We even pulled the battery to shut off all power.”

As I said “power,” the computer came to life and was ready to go to work.

“WTF!”

“Sir, to power down you need to hold the power button down until the blue lit ring goes out.  Even pulling the battery does not immediately shut down the machine; you need to give it several seconds.”

“Is that in the instructions?”

“Yes Sir, it is.”

“Thank you.”

Getting along with the new computer is going to take some time.

8 comments:

  1. Dont go to geek squad they charge 300 bucks to blink at the machine. U have issues come find me ill help u

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  2. ooops Cranky.
    Nothing like making yourself look like a complete Muppet in best Buy is there!

    However - it still didn't answer the question as to why it hadn't restarted itself properly in the first place.

    Did you ask them?

    Lou :-)

    (Self and Hubby are computer geeks if you ever need any advice...lol)

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  3. Ohhh Cranky I feel your pain my lovely lap top is currently at the Geek Squad Hotel getting a nasty ass virus removed. I am missing her badly....

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  4. I plan to go all rag ass on someone just so that I can say "I went all rag ass on someone today". Love it!

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  5. Okay Papa Joe, do you go rag ass on people often? I find that very hard to believe. I mean, you seem like such a friggin fraggin frumping nice guy.

    Huh. You think you know a person....

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  6. Oh the joys of technology!! I hope your new toy doesn't give you any more fits!! Technology is enough to make any non-nerdy individual feel inept!

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  7. You may really feel embarrassed that time, but I know that by now, you will find yourself smiling as you remember this incident. ;) It’s okay! We truly find ourselves in situations like this and other people may have a not so good experience than this one.

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  8. What’s important when you come across such incidents is that you should get your composure back. Haha! You may pretend that nothing happened, or just completely ignore it, or you can just accept the fact that you made a hilarious mistake. ;)

    Ruby Badcoe

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