In a recent post, the great one, Stephen Hayes at the "Chubby Chatterbox," (http://www.chubbychatterbox.com/blog/kill_all_the_lawyers_.en) asks the question, “What do you think of lawyers, there must be some good ones out there." I say yes, yes there are, especially if they are on your side.
Years ago when closing on my second house I really needed a lawyer.
We were moving on up, leaving a small house for a much larger almost hoity toity house. Our old house was sold and we were closing on the new house when we came up against a pain-in-the-butt lawyer for the mortgage company.
It seems we closed on the old house for $4000 less than we stated we expected to sell it for on our application. This lawyer was insistent on knowing how we would make up the $4000.
I explained that we had to take a little less than we thought we could get and surely that was not unusual. She asked, “But how are you going to make up the $4000.”
I said, “Well we are closing on this house 6 months after we filled out our mortgage application. The mortgage on the other house was $350 a month. You approved a new mortgage at $1200 a month 6 months ago based on my income and assets. If I could afford a payment of $850 more than I was paying six months ago, obviously I would be able to save $4000 or more in 6 months.”
She responded, “But how are you going to make up the $4000.”
Now our old house was sold and closed-on and we needed this new house to have a place to live, plus we had been excitedly waiting for this move for over 6 months. This dingbat lawyer was going to disallow the whole deal and leave us temporarily homeless over $4000 that I clearly explained we could cover. This is where my own lawyer went into action.
“Let me speak to your boss.”
The lawyer called her boss and explained the situation. My lawyer took the phone and said, “I don’t understand what the problem is.”
He listened for five minutes as the lawyer on the other end explained that the $4000 short fall was a deal breaker.
He then said, “But I don’t understand what the problem is.”
Five more minutes of listening patiently and then he responded again, “But I don’t understand what the problem is.”
This went on for 30 minutes and every five minutes all my lawyer ever said was, “But I don’t understand what the problem is.”
He then handed the phone to the other lawyer. She listened to her boss and then said, “Yes, but…I know but…$4000…really? OK."
Then we sat down and signed papers for 40 minutes and the new house was ours.
Afterwards my lawyer just said, “Sometimes it is best to not argue but just dazzle them with stupidity.”
So my answer to Mr. Chatterbox is sometimes lawyers should be shot, and sometimes they can be your best friend.