This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Thursday, March 23, 2017



No, this is not about being assaulted and hurt, it is about a battery.

I may write too much about Mrs. C, but I can’t help it, she is a pip…for you young people that is a good thing...sort of, in a backhanded way.  Mrs. C does not like to throw anything away.  What I find entertaining is the excuses she has for saving things.

Today she showed me something she got for free because she signed up for something, or answered a survey, whatever.  It is a small flashlight.  It is very bright, and shines in a diffused lamp like fashion, not a direct flashlight way.  It also has a strong magnet so it can be stuck on anything metal for hands free lighting.  I liked it.  It seems very useful.


In order to demonstrate the light to me, she had to first remove a piece of paper that prevents the battery from making a proper connection.  When she was finished with the demonstration, she reinserted the paper protector.

“What is that for?”

“It keeps the battery fresh.”


“You know, like if you accidentally turn the switch, the light won’t go on and the battery won’t run down.”

“Oh…but you mean if I want to use the light I have to unscrew the cap, remove the paper thing, save it, and then when I am through with the light unscrew the cap and reinsert the paper thing?”


“That is a pain in the ass!”

“It will save the battery.”

“But we have skaty-eight other battery operated items and we don’t do that paper thing to any of them.”

“This light comes with one.”

“So, we have to use it?”


“Let me get this straight.  If I want to use the light, I have to unscrew the cap, take out then paper stop thing, screw the cap back on, make sure not to misplace the paper thing, and then when done, reverse the process, all so the battery won’t run down if I forget to turn off the light?”


“But I don’t think I have ever used a flashlight and forgot to turn it off when done, the bright light generally serves as a reminder to turn it off.”

“It could get accidentally switched on while in a drawer, you could grab something and flip the switch without knowing.”

“So, in order to save a battery from a weird accidental switch turning I have to go through the stupid paper removing and replacing thing.  You know we have about 187 AAA batteries in the pantry.  Some will go dead before we ever use all of them.”

“Just replace the paper thing after you use the light and stop arguing! JERK!”

This light is really quite nice.  I can think of lots of uses for it, for instance while cooking out at night on my Bbq.

Too bad I will never bother to use it.


  1. I agree, a bit too complicated for me if I have to do all that just to get light when I want it. It would be hard to remove that paper in a power outage and you can't see too well, wouldn't it?


  2. Lordy lordy lordy, replacing that bit of paper will not save the battery, but it will make things awkward if you need light in a hurry and all other flashlights are dead.
    Why not store it in a small box in the drawer so it can't be accidentally switched on?

  3. It's not going to save the battery Joe. The battery is only activated when you flip the switch. When it's off it's not making the connection. Don't tell Mrs C I said this but if I were you I'd just take the paper out and bin it and deny all knowledge if she notices. You might be called a jerk but at least you'll be a jerk with a flashlight you can actually use in the dark.

  4. What happens if you get a power cut and and you can't see to remove the paper? Heehee it made a fun post though. Be patient until the novelty wears off.

  5. No, i would not use it either, if i had to go through all of that. There are two flashlights in my bag and neither has ever been turned on by accident.

  6. I actually didn't think it would be possible to insert those tiny slips of paper back in exactly so. Mrs. C must have great dexterity.

  7. You just get yourself one, and throw away the paper.

  8. I, honestly, was looking for a photo of this wonder flashlight ...

  9. She really is a pip. Yes indeed. You have such an interesting life. I love hearing about it too.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend, Joe. ☺

  10. That paper thing is probably to protect the batteries while the product is stored and shipped.

    1. It's only there as proof the product has not been tampered with prior to sale.

  11. Mrs C is a hoot...don't tell her I said so.

  12. Buy her something nice Cranky, she gives you the best blog material:) I just threw away two of those papers yesterday from two new flashlights. I am too lazy for all that accident prevention.

  13. I think you need his 'n hers flashlights.

  14. Lmao. Thanks, needed that today.

  15. Yes, you don't want to possibly accidentally run down the FREE battery of that FREE flashlight! Maybe Mrs. C should keep that flashlight in her storage shed, where it will be safe from your clumsy clutches.

  16. I must have read this wrong; I thought you called your wife a JERK!!


I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!