STUPID HEADLINES 111515

STUPID HEADLINES 111515

It is time again for

When I commuted to work everyday, this is the paper I read.
It is the only thing about commuting that I miss.

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.   

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Green Bay Packers Quarterback Throws Tablet During Carolina Panthers Game – He was flagged for intentional grounding.

Grandmother tries to spite heirs by shredding $1.1 million fortune, – Hey, if they piss me off, I’m spending it not shredding it!

Or

Talk about splitting heirs! (That one is for Hilary)

Man Crashes $1.9M Ferrari Right After Leaving the Dealership – I love this! Does that make me a bad person?

ISIS flag, radical manifesto raise questions about Calif. campus stabber's motive – It only raises questions with Muslim violence deniers. 

Egypt's Great Pyramid has mystery heat spots – Must be the grain fermenting.

Usher allegedly caught stealing cash from Florida church – Why Usher, Why? You’re talented, famous, and rich…WHY?

This vending machine dispenses cars – I love this new Cadillac, can you lend me 160,000 quarters?

Study reveals what accent people think is the sexiest – Turns out to men it is anything that sounds like Wee, Si, or Yes!

What it means to be pansexual – Oops…I thought it meant a really hot chef.

Indonesia uses trained elephants to control forest fires – What the hell, do they stomp them out?

Cop Got Too Wasted To Accept Mothers Against Drunk Driving Award – Sheerioushy I only has a couplem bersh.

Cop pulls over Google self-driving car, finds no driver to ticket – So he just beat the crap out of the car!  “Google Cars Matter!”

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Come back next week for more:

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!

Where there is no fake headline contest