BIRTHDAY PARTIES FOR KIDS
A Cranky Saturday Opinion
Opposing opinions are welcome (wrong, but welcome) on Cranky Opinion Saturday, but please, no name calling…and that means you, you big stupid head!
This cranky old man is having trouble coming up with an opinion for this Saturday, so I will pick on the relatively new tradition of fancy birthday parties for kids. My Grandson Connor is having his third birthday party today.
Are these parties for the children or the parents? Do parents get into the “my party is better than your party” vicious cycle?
Children do not remember very much until the age of at least five, so any party up to that age should just be for family and a few friends.
A present or two, sing “Happy Birthday,” eat cake and take pictures…good.
Clowns, ponies, blow-up jumpy things, zillions of kids and tons of toys…bad.
Years ago in another life, my wife forced me to go to all these parties. After working all week, I really did not want to drive two hours away to spend the first sunny day of summer drinking soda, eating Cheetos, and watching a bunch of two and three year olds whine and break stuff while their parents had to demonstrate that their precious spawn could high five, wave bye-bye, blow kisses, and say that ever so funny, “No way Jose!” to virtually every request.
RT- Mrs. Wiskowski, fifth grade English, would take off 5 points for “Too many words!” in that last sentence.
Of course, all these comments are null and void when it comes to my grandkids. But Hell, they are really cute and deserve to be celebrated!
So there is my opinion on kid’s birthday parties. They suck. They are a waste. They are for spoiled little brats who should be wrapped up in duct tape and sat in a corner while grown-ups drink wine and have fun.
Except my grandkids. They should be on display for all to marvel at their adorableness, intelligence, and incredible advanced abilities.
Wait, I have some pictures and a video of Connor and me bumping fists. It’s here someplace. Hold on, it is really cute. Wait…it is right here…don’t go!
Oh well, I’ll just put it up on that “your-tube” thingy. Check it out; it is sure to become a virus.
The preceding opinions were that of a cranky old man and not necessarily those of management…Mrs. Cranky.