STUPID HEADLINES 111812
The power is back and so are Cranky’s Stupid Headlines of the week, my stupid headlines and stupider, sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.
Arizona woman runs down husband with car for not voting – Imagine if he voted the wrong way!
‘GIF’ named word of the year by Oxford American Dictionary – Gif for Graphics Interchange Format. Personally I voted for Adew - Acronyms Don’t Equal Words.
Ohio woman who drove on sidewalk to avoid school bus holds 'idiot' sign under court order – Idiots protest Ohio woman carrying “Idiot” sign for insulting Idiots.
4 Surgeries to Avoid – Neckectomy, penilectomy, heart transplant from a Republican, brain transplant from a Democrat.
Judge Judy celebrates 70th birthday in white bikini – OK, this one time I gotta disagree with Judge Judy!
North Carolina judge nixes New Year's Eve possum drop – Judge rules with PETA and slowly lowering the possum in a cage is not allowed. Strangely, it seems shooting the little bugger between the eyes and dropping him from a tree at mid-night New Year’s Eve would be within the law.
Holder, Mueller face mounting questions on why Petraeus probe kept under wraps – "face mounting questions?" "Petraeus probe under wraps?" Come on, this is just way too easy!
Senator-elect Angus King sides with Democrats – Maine Senator Angus King replaces Olympia Snowe…I don’t know a thing about their politics, but do Maine politicians have GREAT NAMES or WHAT?
That's a mouthful: South Africa police say man swallowed 220 diamonds – Talk about expensive taste!*
Ex-teacher says school officials told her to 'train' her breasts to not make milk at work – Teacher’s breasts could roll over and sit up and beg, but they would not stop making milk!
Rhode Island man's fake money had Lincoln's face instead of Franklin's, police say – Other than that it was a perfect counterfeit.
Cracker Jack’d: New version of Cracker Jacks to contain caffeine – GreatalittlecaffeinewithaMonsterpowerdrinkloveitcauseyoucanthaveenoughenergydoIstillgetafreeprize?
Twinkies? Chris Christie Doesn't Want No Stinkin' Twinkies – New Jersey Governor strongly denies he is Gay…not that it matters.