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Monday, July 29, 2019

How Long Are You Going To Take?

How Long Are You Going To Take?

I often write about Mrs. Cranky.  Lately I am paying special attention to how she treats me. You see we have been married now four and a half years.  In six months I have a big decision to make.  Mrs. Cranky doesn’t believe me, but when we married there was some legal papers filed. I claim there is a clause which apparently she and her lawyer missed that gives me a chance to reevaluate the relationship after five years.  I call it the bail-out clause.

So far things are going very nicely.  Except for being called a jerk from time to time, we have a very nice relationship; however since I only have this one time and one time only chance of activating my bail-out clause I am closely evaluating her behavior.

Today for instance, I was washing dishes.  We are in a small apartment on the Shore where the kitchen is only feet from the living area.  We have no dishwasher, so I like to keep on top of the dirty dishes.  It was 11:00 and I was running the hot water and scrubbing dishes, pots and pans.

“How much longer are you going to be?”

“Maybe ten minutes.  What am I making too much noise washing dishes?  Oh, what a horrible inconsiderate husband, noisily washing the dishes while you are trying to get caught up on “Say Yes to the Dress” on the TV.  I am sooo sorry.”

“I didn’t say you were making too much noise.”

“I know you; I know exactly why you were asking.”

“I don’t think you do.”

“Then why do you care that I am washing the dishes?”

“Well it is not because I can’t hear.”

“OK, I’m sorry, I thought I was disturbing your TV watching with my dish washing. “

“See, you don’t know everything Mr. Smartypants.”

“So why do you care how much longer I am going to take doing the dishes?”

“Just curious.”


“OK, I’m watching on-demand and have the TV on pause while you are making all that noise.”

One step closer to invoking the clause in six months.
Re-run from July 2015...and yes, the clause ran out.


  1. Hahahahaha. I'd like to read Mrs. Cranky's evaluation of you! Hahahaha. You should add a Q and A segment to your blog. You ask Mrs. C some questions of the day, she answers them, you post 'em. People are always interested in the "woman behind the man." - Happy Monday!!!

  2. only 4.5 years? No out clause in 5 yrs, too soon, besides if you wait long enough you'll be too tired to leave. Or as I like to say, You can leave me but I'm going with you.

  3. Small aggravations Cranky...very small but you know, get enough of them......

  4. That is funny about the "bail out clause". Do you suppose if all marriages had one of those, people would be on the best behavior, at least for 5 years? Guess you then either leave or reup for another 5 with the same rules. Sounds good to me.

  5. What Karen said. I'm guessing your wife would bring up more than the jerk thing if she evaluated you. Just saying.

    Have a fabulous day and week, Joe. ♪♫♪♫

  6. I thought you guys were married longer than 4.5 years? I thought I'd been following you off and on since we were in Southern California and we've been gone from there 4.5 years and you guys were married or so I thought. Love to hear if you decide to opt out after 5 years. I'm thinking not.


  7. I am so discombobulated at the thought of a husband washing dishes that I can't concentrate on anything else!

  8. Heeheehee! Yep, you know you have a good thing going and i know you will keep it.

  9. You are the man,if you wash the pots and pans.

  10. Jack and I have a system worked out concerning our marriage. We came up with it after our kids were born. We always said whoever asks for the divorce gets everything...the house, the furniture, the car, the kids, the bills...everything. Now that we're older and the kids are gone we're still covered. Now whoever brings up divorce is granted all the crap we've accumulated over the years. We'll celebrate 45 years of marriage this August.

  11. While she has the TV on pause, she could come out and help you get finished faster.

  12. Mrs C can invoke the clause too.

    God bless.

  13. dear Joe

    i am sorry if you feel bit bad with her words ,but i fully believe that you are doing great as good husband

    5 years are beginning of any life partnership ,slowly you break the shell and come closer to know each other better
    next five years must be called
    years of acceptance
    and after that time began when two people started to be as one
    keep you spirit high and try not to keep eye on her behavior or if you do do it for your ownself either

  14. Bail-out clause...hmmm. The more I think about this, the more I like it. And to be honest, this should be something after every five-year interval - not just the first one. I think it would lead to better behavior!