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Monday, February 25, 2019



An oldie from 2012*

Something is missing in the relationship between my wife and me.  We never fight.  We hardly even disagree on things.  I thought couples were supposed to fight.  Every couple I’ve known fights.  I always fought in my other marriages.  It worries me that we never fight.

So the other day I turned to Mrs. Cranky and said,
“We need to fight.”


“We need to fight.”


“Because it’s going on four years since we’ve met and we haven’t had a real fight.  It doesn’t seem normal.  It doesn’t seem right.  I’m used to having two or three fights a month.”

“But I don’t want to have a fight.”

“We really should have at least one fight.”

“What do you want to fight about?”

“How about doing the dishes?  I never help with the dishes.”

“Yes you do.”

“Not really; all I do is rinse and occasionally empty the dishwasher.”

“That’s helping.”

“I don’t think it is.”

“Sure it is, you help a lot and I appreciate it.”

“No I don’t, you should yell at me over my lack of help.”

“But I don’t want to yell at you, I have no reason to start a fight.  You want a fight you yell at me!”

“What should I yell at you about?”

“I don’t know; you wanted to have a fight.”

“Yeah, but I don’t know how to start a fight, I’m a counter puncher.”

“Well I don’t know how to start a fight either!”

“Hmmm…that is a problem.  I guess we’ll just have to agree to agree.”

“I agree.”

“Do you need any help with the dishes?”

“You’re a jerk!”
*Last time this was posted a few people claimed that without fighting there is no passion.  Not to worry.  We still have not had a real fight and no passion is no issue...we do bicker a lot. 


  1. Good for you, not fighting! A bit of bickering, a bit of her calling you a jerk and you accusing her of being a pack rat or hiding food from you, that's more than enough to keep the blood flowing.

    Next time you think you want a fight, tell yourself that it is a pleasure all the greater for being deferred, and keep deferring.

  2. Make the most of what you have and leave the fighting to others. Life is too short.

  3. There is an app you can buy for your phone or computer. It creates random subjects for couples to argue about. Like whether when you open a window, does the heat go out of the house or does the cold get in? Or, should eggs be sold in packs of 10 or 12? Every random subject is sure to start an argument. Great fun.

    God bless.

  4. We have not had many fights in our marriage. More like one of us hurts the other's feelings.

  5. Good for you two; you found the way to a happy life.

    We have friends who never fight. Yes, on rare occasions, she will tell us some small thing that he does that annoys her, but she would never tell him. I sometimes think that they have a boring relationship, but oh, there is something to be said about boring. They are very happily married and adore each other. It is lovely to see.

  6. Excellent. We don't fight much either, but I have learned to always get in the last word..."Yes dear."

  7. We used to fight...sometimes we had some real doozies. If you're paying attention at all though, you learn that there aren't many things worth fighting about. When we look back at some of those, we both wonder why it seemed so important then. Oh! I think it's called maturity.

  8. Hubby and I don't fight either. We are happy and there isn't a need for bickering about anything. Life is too short for that. Peaceful in our home.

    Have a fabulous day and week, Joe. 😎

  9. Its probably because both of you were "older" when you started being together. As we have "matured" (i.e. gotten older) we tend to fight less. I think we realize what is the point. Try to get along the best we can; life is too short to fight.


  10. So glad you can keep your fights to a slight bicker with a "Jerk" exclamation point. Pretty tame compared to some. Keep that going.

  11. Oh my gosh! I feel like a rare, rare unicorn! Hick and I fight. We also watch TV, and I don't mean PBS. Good for you and Mrs. C. Whatever you do, it's working.

  12. I never fought with my first husband, but then we rarely communicated much with him being gone so often (in the army playing at wars), with me having to raise the kids and make all the decisions, there wasn't much left to talk or fight about. Second husband was different, mental problems and so on had me walking on eggshells, so there was no fighting. Scary days and I'm glad they're over.

  13. I had huge fights with my ex-husband. Maybe I learned from that - my husband and I have been married for almost 30 years now and we never fight.