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Sunday, July 30, 2017


STUPID HEADLINES 073117 (oops, got the date wrong...I'm retired, what do I know)
It’s time again for
How much less?
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
Stop Making Babies and Driving Cars to Save the Planet – Well I assure you, I have never made a baby while driving a car, so don’t blame that heat spell on me!
Airline spokesperson claimed person ‘passed gas’ on an American Airlines plane, forcing all passengers off at NC airport – American Airlines has decided to discontinue the burrito lunch option.
Will Smith says 'Star Wars' was better than sex – Either I saw a different movie, or he hasn’t found a very good partner!
Wisconsin company to implant microchips in its employees in August – There go the long bathroom breaks.
200 Allegiant Airlines passengers stranded in Las Vegas – When Allegiant stops in Vegas, you stay in Vegas!
79-year-old woman caught going 149 mph in Porsche Boxster said she 'needed to clear [her] head' – I’d like to know how they caught her!
Dentures left at scene lead to Tennessee man's rape conviction 16 years later – The only thing stupider than leaving your dentures at the scene of a crime, was it took 16 years to find the guy…and his name was on the dentures!
Teacher, 28, banned from classroom after allegedly having sex with student on plane – I think she should be banned from the plane.
Tom Brady is the owner of the New York Jets - according to Google – Well he owns them on the field, along with the rest of the NFL.
One-armed machete-wielding man arrested by Maine State Police – Dr. Richard Kimble was immediately released.

Humans came from galaxies, far, far away, scientists say – See, we definitely need a wall!

And the Feel-Good Story of the week:
Man Saves Beached Octopus, Last Thing He Expects Is A Thank You He'll Never Forget – Who doesn’t love a good octopus story?
Come back again next week for more


  1. The Little Old Lady from Pasadena lives!

    Fun headlines, thanks for the morning smile.

  2. Bwahahahahahahaha. Makes you wonder doesn't it. Yes it does.

    I linked this post to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

  3. An amusing post. I enjoyed reading.

    Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.

  4. Ouch, the first one. "If you didn't act like so gay, we wouldn't have to bully you."

  5. That little octopus kind of gives you chills doesn't it?

  6. One of your best "Stupid Headlines"!!

  7. The pentagon should track down that gassy passenger. If they could bottle that----
    Loved the octopus story and the guy with a gentle heart.

  8. Bwahahahahahahaha. Makes you wonder doesn't it. Yes it does.


  9. No burrito lunch option on airplanes? Why fly at all?

  10. I can't see getting microchiped by your employer or anyone for that matter.

    The octopus rescue was really good, I liked that.

  11. I suppose the alleged student on the plane went a little overboard acting less gay.

  12. I wonder how they would have cuffed that one armed guy?

  13. "79-year-old woman caught going 149 mph in Porsche Boxster"

    Was this a remake of the old Jan and Dean song, "The Little Old Lady From Pasadena"...go Granny, go Granny, go Granny go!

  14. Utah boy pledges allegiance to flag when no one's looking – This brings to mind the classic philosophic question - If a boy pledges allegiance ...

  15. Never thought I'd be saying this to Will Smith, but. . . you're doing it wrong. . .

    And that must've been one HELL of a fart. . .

  16. Note to self...don't fly American Airlines, don't fly Allegiant Airlines. Probably should test Will Smith's theory.


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