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Wednesday, March 30, 2016

A Day At The Movies


A Day At The Movies
The other night we went to see “My Big Fat Greek Wedding II.”  It is a very funny movie, not the least bit disappointing as are many sequels,  but this post is about the theater, not the movie.

Mrs. C wanted to go to the 2:00 showing, and then do an early dinner.  I preferred the 4:40 showing and then having a later dinner. 

I won.

Then Mrs. C wanted to leave at 3:30 for the theater.  I thought that was ridiculous because I didn’t want to walk the Mall while waiting for the movie to start.  I was told that this theater required that you select your seat when you buy your ticket, much like an airplane, it is a small theater and we needed to go early to get a good seat.

I lost.

As it turned out, even leaving early, we did not get that good a seat, we were forced to choose a seat up front in the second row.  I don’t mind sitting way up front, especially with these new modern theaters.  Every seat has lots of room and they are so comfortable it is sometimes difficult to stay awake.  The seats also tilt back and have a foot rest just like a comfortable lounge chair.

We settled into our seats well before show time and the theater was almost empty.  Then she came in.  She was a complainer.  Worse, she was a complainer who needed validation from others.  Her seat was in the first row, directly in front of our seats.

“These seats are too close!”  She complained first to her daughter, then to Mrs. C and then to everyone who entered the theater. 

Mrs. C told her it was not too bad because the seats adjusted and you didn’t have to crane your neck.

“This seat button does not work!”

Mrs. C showed her how to push the button.

“I hate these seats, they are too close, maybe we could just take another seat back further; are people really coming in for those seats.”

The daughter responded, “They were not available because they were paid for.”

“There is so much leg room, why is there so much leg room?  They should have used less leg room so they could have put the seats back further.” 

Then directly to me, “Don’t you think there is too much leg room?”

So far everyone she spoke to validated her complaints, because they didn’t really want to get into an argument.  Mrs. C anticipating my response gave me an elbow. 

It didn’t work.

“Actually I like my seat, I love the leg room, and I’m pretty sure it is too late for anyone to change the layout 15 minutes before the movie starts.”  I got a harder elbow.

“I don’t care,” I said in a whisper intentionally just a little too loud, “I want to enjoy the movie, and the complaining about the seats is starting to piss me off.”

“WELL! I was just saying!”

“Yes, I know, and I am just responding.”

The complainer did not stop, but at least she no longer addressed her complaints in our direction.  Then she moved over to seats still in the front row, but all the way on the side; worse seats in my opinion, but I said nothing.

“These seats are a little better she told her daughter.”

Don’t you know, the correct patrons of those seats came in later and not wanting to say anything took the seats behind the complainer. When the movie started the people who had those assigned seats came in and the non-complainers had to move to the seats directly in front of us, the complainer’s assigned seats. 

(Is this too complicated? Never mind it is not that important.)

While this was happening there was another seat battle behind me.  I did not look, I did not want to get involved, but there was a lot of  “Fuck this” and “Fuck you” and “Bull shit” going on.  Then I heard “Fuck it, I don’t want the seats” and two people apparently stomped out.

Complainer lady saw this and saw there were now two empty seats further back and immediately grabbed them.

“These are much better, but they are still too close and why is there so much leg room, and shouldn’t the first people in get their choice of seats and…”

Several people shushed her and we were able to enjoy the movie.

After the movie was over, both of us made a trip to the rest room.  When Mrs. C came out she was shaking her head.

“Mrs. Complainawitz is in there and she is bitching to anyone who will listen about how bad the seats are and how they should change the design of the theater…she will not shut up.”

“Well she came close to ruining the movie for me.”

“I told you we should have gone to the 2:00 showing!”

At least she didn’t call me a jerk.

21 comments:

  1. I'm planning on seeing that same movie next week in a theatre that doesn't have reclining seats, but I don't mind that. I'm long sighted, so sit way at the back in the top row and get a clear view of the screen because the centre seat fronts the aisle, so no one is in front of me. I always get there early enough to claim that seat. There isn't seat selection with tickets either, people sit where they choose as they come in.
    You should have called the usher to quiet the complainer.

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  2. I'm surprised she wasn't thrown out!

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  3. It always surprises me how little self-awareness people have.

    Maybe some people simply don't care how they are perceived by those around them, but it seems like more like they are so self-absorbed that they simply don't care.

    The upside is that you can probably safely go back to that theater now and not run into her. She's probably not going back.

    Granted, there are thousands of others just like her, but still...

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  4. And THAT, among a bunch of other reasons, is why I don't go to the theatre. I don't look good in orange.

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  5. I started reading thinking, "Oh! Great idea! We haven't been to a movie in ages, maybe we should go!" and ended thinking, "I'm just glad that crazy woman didn't have a gun." and "My couch and On Demand look much better to me today than they did yesterday!"
    And btw - thought of you on the plane coming home from Disney. We had a "screaming-laughter" woman right in back of us. O.M.G. I thought I'd die. She finally wore herself out over the Carolinas.

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  6. And this is how fights break out in my world. Needless to say, I dont go to the movies anymore. Like Bob said...I wouldnt look good in orange.
    Lisa

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  7. It is too complicated to go to a movie in New Jersey! We have fancy theaters, but not assigned seats, which does make one come early if they want their preferential place to sit. At least she didn't complain about the price of bottled water; that is my biggest complaint when we go out to see a movie.

    Glad to hear the movie was a good one; looking forward to seeing it.

    betty

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    1. We have since found out you can order on-line, which is why there were so many empty seats until the movie began.

      I would never pay $4 for water. We bring our own water and candy, apparently the teen kids being paid min wage don't really care to strip search old people.

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    2. I'm with you on the water! A little pint sized bottle stays in my handbag... and funny, I hardly ever drink it.

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  8. This lady would complain if you hung her with a new rope. She could mess up a free lunch. She's so miserable that she wants everyone else to be miserable. You were far too kind to her. You also just explained why I don't go to movies anymore.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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  9. She sounds exactly like the harpy who thinks of herself as my stepmother. It's not enough for her to complain about everything, she also wants you to validate her opinion. I stopped playing the game pretty quickly. And now that my father has died (to his great relief, I think) I have no further contact with her.

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  10. Who on this planet complains about extra leg room? That is unreal!

    I've heard about those lazy boy theatres, but have never been. My husband would probably be asleep by the opening scene.

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  11. Every time I think about going to the movie theater someone comes along a writes about what a miserable experience someone had.
    It has saved me a small fortune in admission tickets.
    Thanks again.

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  12. We don't go to the theatre any more because of the price of admission. But SWMBO did go to a movie with a friend she was visiting in Sun City. She said every seat was taken and the audience was a sea of white (hair). But she enjoyed the movie.

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  13. It matters not what time you go, Mrs. Compainawitz's relatives will be there.

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  14. My what posh theaters you have. That was one miserable person. Just be grateful that you didn't have to go home with her. I hate those who loudly comment about the movie all the way through.

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  15. Something is wrong with that woman and I hope she does not go to the theater again!

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  16. What a nightmare. Glad you liked the movie. I haven't seen it because I figured it would be so bad it would ruin the first one for me.

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  17. Dang it! I had hoped you were going to spend the whole movie scrunched down in your recliner, kicking the back of her seat.

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  18. Here in Florida you can get shot and killed in a movie theater for less than that!

    Glad you liked the movie - I've been debating whether to go and see it or to wait until the video comes out.

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  19. Mrs. C's intuition was right... the 2:00 show could have saved you that rise in blood pressure. :)

    Interesting theater. I haven't experienced booking a seat yet.

    Good to hear a positive review on the movie. One of my movie club girls said that she'd read bad reviews and made me put it further down my list of movies to see. It's now going back up a notch. We went to see the Sally Field movie - My name is Doris, I think. Anyway, great laughs!

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