STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY 062319
This week's stupid headlines, and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
Alabama
man allegedly fed 'attack squirrel' meth to keep it aggressive – Poor man’s pit-bull!
Missouri
teen 'felt God' save him in 50-foot-drop off cliff – If he was a really good Christian,
maybe God would have stopped him before he fell.
Millennials,
Gen Zers opt out of deodorant use – Most deodorants stink, if you bathe regularly, and do not
have a persistent perspiration problem, then these young people are right on!
Marilyn
Monroe statue stolen from atop Hollywood art space – I’ve got the headline for when the
crooks are caught, “Bust of busts thieves are busted!”
US-China
trade war could lead to shortage on Bibles – Really? That is what we need to worry about with a
trade war? There is a Bible in every
hotel/motel room in the country and about 99% have never been opened!
NHL star
wants to return for 22nd season: 'I got nothing else going on' – I feel the same way about blogging.
New
Jersey man arrested after calling 911 to complain about bar banning – When a bar bans you, you just might
have a drinking problem. Dialing 911 to
complain about it when you are drunk pretty much confirms it.
Gun-wielding
Alabama granny held wanted man at gunpoint – A Jersey Grandma would have held him at bay with
cookies and milk.
Bank of
America CEO says company wants a ‘cashless society’ – Unfortunately they are off to a good
start with me.
Woman
released from jail locks herself in stairwell for 2.5 days after getting lost –
Not so great an
escape.
Nigerian
investigators dismiss wild reports rogue gorilla ate $22G in cash at zoo – I suspect it was the Prince that
keeps emailing me.
Feel-Good Headline of the Week:
103-year-old
runner Julia "Hurricane" Hawkins breaks new record – I’ve got to get to the gym!
 |
| GO Hurricane GO!! |
What strikes me is that most of our Bibles are printed in China, where the Bible is all but banned and the persecution of religion is worse now than during the Cultural Revolution.
ReplyDeleteTime to hit the gym is right!
interesting news and even more interesting opinion dear Joe
ReplyDeletei find Julia such an inspiration ,yes gym should remain in our routines so we too can live without being embarrassed and dependent just like this wonderful lady
glad you chose this one to share
Whoa! Is Alabama entering a competition with Florida?
ReplyDeleteAlabama is probably a nice place to visit, but going by this, I wouldn't want to live there. Amazing story about 103-year-old Julia. She is such an inspiration! Now I feel guilty for sloughing off those workouts. :P
ReplyDeleteLoved the feel good story about the 103 year old. I need to hit the gym myself.
ReplyDeleteYou can't make these stories up. The world is a weird place and in some places it's weirder than other places.
Have a fabulous day and week, Joe. ♪♫♪♫
How would a Nigerian gorilla survive in a cashless society?
ReplyDeleteI love the feel good story! Man. I hope I'm doing that at 103! - The whole cashless society... There's a story in the Bible about that. Just sayin'.. Happy Sunday, Joe!
ReplyDeleteThe bank I worked at 40 years ago was talking cashless society. Not a very rapid moving concept. Doubt I'll live to see it.
ReplyDeleteSince Julia only started running at 100, I have a few years to think about it yet. Seriously, what a woman.
Love the snark! And that 103yr old makes me feel guilty.
ReplyDeleteCashless society? At last! My time has come - I'm already there with that one!��
ReplyDeleteThat was the slow news week in Florida, huh?
ReplyDelete