I am often
asked by family or friends, “Why do you and Mrs. C fight so often?”
I reply, “We
don’t fight, we bicker.”
What is the difference
you ask?
This is one
area of couples dynamics at which I am expert.
Let me explain.
“JOE! Did
you take out the trash?”
“NO, I forgot.”
“You ALWAYS forget!”
“I DO NOT, I sometimes forget, and there is still time to take it out.”
“Why don’t
you EVER remember?”
“What is
the big deal, I’m on it now?”
“The big
deal is I ALWAYS have to tell you because you are LAZY and STUPID and a pain in
my ass!”
“Shut up!”
“No, YOU shut up and get off your fat ass and toss the trash!”
“I SAID I
WAS ON IT!”
“ASS
HOLE!”
Under my
breath, “F*ck You!”
That
is a fight.
“Joseph…did
you take out the trash?”
“Yes.”
“No you didn’t.”
“How do
you know?”
“Because
you always need me to remind you.”
“Not
always.”
“Always.”
“Shut up.”
“YOU shut
up.”
“No YOU
shut up.”
“How are
you going to make me?”
“By taking
out the trash.”
“You’re a
jerk.”
“Yeah,
but I’m your jerk.”
“I know!”
“Where are
we going for dinner tonight?”
“How
about the Boob place, we haven’t gone in a while?” (Very nice local restaurant where the waitresses happen to be
well endowed…we always forget the name of the place.)
“Sounds good,
Boob place it is.”
That
is bickering.
Hilarious! ☺ Speaking as someone who's been married for going on 46 years, this sounds all too familiar. (Both versions!)
ReplyDeleteI don't think my spouse and I see each other enough to bicker. We will see what happens if he ever retires.
ReplyDeleteJack and I don't fight or bicker much. I think we're missing out on a good thing...if Jack knew a Boob place was the reward he'd be more into the bickering I think!
ReplyDeleteA comment from "Should Fish More" has been removed. This person who I believe to be a respected Doctor who served his country in Viet Nam does not like me or my posts and seems to feel a need to troll me from time to time. His blog is found here http://memoirsofacardiopulmonaryguy.blogspot.com/ if you agree that my posts are stupid and boring, then go tell him you agree and you will not be reading anymore, if you think he is being a DICK, then if you tell him I wouldn't care. I do not understand why people troll those they do not like..do not like, do not read, there is a whole lot of material in the world these days, do not waste your time with my stupid blog that is just posted for my own enjoyment and to keep busy in retirement.
ReplyDeleteComment moderation is back on due to this one Jerk who has nothing better to do than try and piss on my blog. I'm a nobody, I know it, what is your point? Go F*ch with someone who makes a difference in this world! Bye the way Mr. tough guy who once threatened to go "all western on me", what ever that means, I'm pretty sure this 73 year old man could easily kick your ass!!
Hick and I bicker constantly. If we didn't, there would be no communication. I'm really glad he doesn't read blogs, because then he'd know that he's totally missing out on a Boob Restaurant.
ReplyDeleteI understand the difference. Bickering is just the harmless daily back-and-forth between two people who love each other. Fighting is usually anger based, and can be escalated into the physical harming of others.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand trolls either. I have been fortunate or blessed not to be plaqued by them.
ReplyDeleteArguing you don't speak to each other for a day bickering you do. That's what happens here at least.
Betty
I can honestly say there was no bickering as such between my man and I. Not too many arguments either.
ReplyDeleteAnd there is a certain of tone of voice that goes with it as well.
ReplyDeleteAs I was reading the first one I was thinking, Oooh Joe you are in for a hurtin' talking like that to your wife. Then I see the bickering and laughed. Those words, "I'm your jerk" have been said at my home since 1987. Only change jerk to most anything else. Yep, he's my jerk.
ReplyDeleteSome people just love a good bickering. Me, not so much. Then again ....
ReplyDelete... if we happened to have an awesome restaurant that also was a good boob place, that'd trigger bickering every time.
No matter who suggested it.
How wonderful to be someone's jerk😍. Thats just how the Garry and I bicker - we do it nicely. Life is too short to do it any other way. The troll, by the way probably isn't anyone's jerk 'cept his own. You've got Mrs C and this lovely blog where you entertain people with your wit. And the boob restaurant of course. 😂
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahaaha!!!! To a "T" you nailed it!
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh! This is so funny. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteYep, that's just a bicker, and it's two people who love each other bicker, too.
ReplyDeleteGreat job showing the difference. Arguing come from anger and bickering is tempered by love. Before your time there was a show on the radio (yes, radio) called the Bickersons. The whole show was based on the art of bickering. My parents who never argued, somehow loved that show. Kind of think my parents were holding back. You and Mrs. C don't have that problem which is pretty darn healthy.
ReplyDeleteI think bickering requires a good sense of humor, that's what makes it fun.
ReplyDelete