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Thursday, July 22, 2021

Even at Eighty-seven!


Even at Eighty-seven!


So I played golf today.  I usually just go out by myself and if it is busy get paired up with other golfers.  Today I was paired up with three old geezers.  Well two of them were 76 and one, Tim, was 87, so at 75 I was the youngest and I called them old geezers.

The 87 YO had a deformed right hand, I believe from polio and was recovering from an operation which relieved a nerve situation.  He weighed maybe 110 pounds, and he hit his drives from 190 to 230 yards.  Pretty damn good for an 87 YO man with a deformed right hand.  He probably scored under 100.

Pretty damn good for anyone over 65.

Tim was a bit on the salty side and he regaled me with stories of his youth caddying during WWII at age 12, earning .25 a round carrying bags.  If he found a ball, he could sell it for more than he earned hauling the bags around.  Apparently during the war, golf balls were not a priority and they were hard to come by.

Tim was full of bad jokes, most dirty and many highly socially incorrect.  I love it when someone says,

“I’ve got a good joke for you…you’re not Jewish, are you?”

I mean, if I was Jewish, I’d already be insulted just because you had a joke that you knew was offensive to anyone that was Jewish.  Actually, the joke was not really offensive to Jewish people, it was mostly offensive to Gay people.  It was also just corny, but hey the dudes 87 and he’s gone through some stuff in his life, he’s not about to turn all politically correct at this point.  I also don’t really think Tim has an actual mean or racist bone in his body. 

What really struck me about Tim and what I consider to be a life lesson, was that even at 87, golf was able to get the better of him from time to time.

He hit an occasional flub, which I suspect that as a younger man he hardly ever would hit, and he let out a string of profanities that would make a porn star cringe.  He would slam his club into the ground as he let the profanities fly, then he would pick up his club, walk towards his ball and smile like it didn’t really matter. 

Because, it really doesn’t matter.  It’s just a game, it’s just one bad shot, it won’t make the evening news,

“This just in, Tim hit a really bad golf shot on the 7th hole, took an 8 ruining a good round.”

No, it never makes the evening news because it is not important, except that for one split second, the game gets the better of even an 87-year-old man with a deformed hand, and it seems very important. 

Then he realizes he is never going to make the PGA tour, even the senior circuit, and he remembers that it is a pretty great thing that he can play 18 holes of golf with a bunch of young 76-year-olds, pee in the woods, tell dirty jokes and hit a golf ball 230 yards (ok, once).

Maybe in 12 years, I too will learn to not let a crappy shot fester, and just move on to the next shot.

Probably not.



  1. He sure didn't let it fester. He just filled the air and your ears with his frustration and let it slide--till the next time.
    Better work on your cussing vocabulary Joe if you want to emulate him in 12 years:))

  2. Maybe you will find within new cuss words that will catch never know :-)
    Sport, no matter the age, always makes us better!

  3. I'm surprised they didn't put a child safety seat in the golf cart for you. Shame on Tim for contributing to the delinquency of a young 'un such as yourself!

  4. At that age he's going to do and say whatever he wants. He's earned that right. You're right it's a game, but it does matter. Especially when you're playing with others.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend, Joe. 😎

  5. That he is still alive and breathing at 87 is a blessing. And I bet he knows that too and still has a lot of spunk in living his life. Good for him!


  6. How about, every time to golf a score higher than you wanted, claim you golfed the age you want to live to be.

    Tim does sound like quite the live wire.

  7. I played my last rounds of golf with a jazz pianist who had a ferocious temper. Whenever he made a bad shot (which was frequently) he'd cuss outrageously. Even I was embarrassed and that takes a lot. I decided that I didn't want to play golf anymore and I quit. Maybe I should have hung with it.

  8. I get a kick out of the old geezers - I enjoy listening to them.

  9. I enjoyed watching the 82yr. old female astronaut jumping out of that capsule the billionaire dude made. She was finally able to go to space. Never too old for an adventure! (As long as you're in shape to do that!) I went to Top Golf once. I hit the ball a few times. I was surprised because once I went to a driving range and couldn't hit a single ball! I doubt at 87 I will be able to hit anything, anywhere!