COED SHOPPING

COED SHOPPING

Men and Woman are very different about shopping.

Women are more proud of bargains than almost anything else.  Well they are to other woman.  When a man pays a compliment to a woman on a new dress she says,

“Oh, why thank you very much.”

When a woman compliments the same woman on the same dress:

“Do you like it?  I bought it at Target (“Tarjay” to really annoying, pretentious women.)  It was 49.99 marked down from 89.99!”

Or

“Really, this old thing?  I just pulled it out of my closet.”  Either way, she will never wear that dress again.

If a man pays a compliment to another man:

“Dude, nice jacket.”

“Huh…oh, thanks.”

A woman pays a compliment to a man:

“I really like that jacket.”

“Huh…oh thanks.” 

He will now wear that jacket whenever he is with this lady, even five years later…he will wear the same jacket.

When a woman shops for clothes, she loves the experience.   She will pick through row after row of different dresses, blouses, shoes…whatever.  She tries them all on, and will ask any other woman in the store, “Does this look nice on me?” Regardless of the answer, she responds, “Hmmm, I don’t know it may be too ______ (fill in the blank.)”  Ultimately she picks the first item she looked at…she can always return it later.

A man does not shop for clothes.  He knows what color, and style he wants before he enters the store.  He will grab it, pay for it, and go home.  Later, if it doesn’t fit just right, it will be put in his closet and never be worn again.

Men should not shop with women.  It is torture to the man.  The waiting, the having his opinion ignored and the waiting, plus the waiting, and then there is the waiting…it is unbearable.  Women know this, and do not ask a man to shop with them unless they are pissed off at him. 

The only thing worse to a man than shopping with a woman is couples counseling.

Women, if you want to know how miserable it is for your man to shop with you, go with him to shop for a hammer.

“Hmmm, ball peen or claw, sledge or mallet, rubber grip or leather, long handle or short.  Excuse me sir, can I try this out with a nail and a two by four?”

Later:

“Hey Joe, nice hammer.”

“Thanks dude, $9.99 at Lowes, marked down from 14.98.”