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Saturday, November 19, 2016

STUPID HEADLINES 112016


STUPID HEADLINES 112016

It is time again for
He wants greeting changed to Heaveno...no, really!
Stupid Headline Sunday

 This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 

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Local Greek governments given up to 2,129 years to repay debt – You know, “Debt” is from the Greek word “Debetakus” meaning “The check is in the mail.”

Regular drinking preserves 'good cholesterol' levels – Preserves as in “pickles”?

China bans 'fatty' nickname mocking Kim Jong Un on the Internet – Well you can call him Kim, and you can call him Kim Jong, and you can call him KJ, and you can call him KJU, and you can call him KJ Un; but you doesn’t has to call him “Big Fat Murderous Piece Of Dog Crap”!

Sweden Launches Mansplaining Hotline – Mansplaining: when a man explains something to a woman without being asked, particularly something which she might already know more about than the man. 

Men demand a Ladydont hotline – Ladydont: When a woman warns a man not to do something stupid before he has a chance to do it, especially something they both know darn well is really stupid.

Women want a Mando hotline – Mando: When man does something really stupid that a lady told them not to do, just because a lady told them not to do it even though he knew it was really stupid.

Feminist Snow Plowing System Brings Stockholm to a Standstill – Apparently plowing the streets used more by women first didn’t work out too well.  Boggles my mind!!

Tourist who claimed she was raped in Dubai is charged with extramarital sex – The progressive culture of Dubai is warning married women “Do not get raped” or you will face the consequences.  My mind is now Boggled squared!

Alien hunter says he found a fossilized grizzly bear on Mars – That’s not an alien, hell we have grizzly bears on Earth.

Chicago suburb revokes liquor license of strip club next to convent – So it is now a nun-alcoholic strip club.

Dead deer in shopping cart at Virginia Wal-Mart shocks customers – Shoppers don’t usually see dead deer in a cart at Wal-Mart until Black Friday.

Doctors Remove Wedding Ring From Man’s Penis – This dude either has a huge wedding finger or…

Man sentenced to jail after using Cheetos to set ex’s home on fire – Massachusetts man goes to jail after breaking little known law against using Cheetos as an accelerant.

AND THE FEEL GOOD HEADLINE OF THE WEEK:

Grandma’s wrong number text goes viral after inviting stranger to Thanksgiving dinner – Young man invited in error strikes up a friendship and he is coming to dinner!


Hinton jokingly asked if he could still "get a plate" at dinner—and his new digital friend replied, “Of course you can. That's what grandmas do...feed everyone.”


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Come Back Next Week For More


STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!

14 comments:

  1. China bans 'fatty' nickname mocking Kim Jong Un on the Internet –

    I remember that old routine from the Sonny and Cher show. Are we really that old?

    KJ's wife is missing. I think he ate her.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's a good thing that Kingsville, Texas "Hello" guy doesn't live in Huntsville, Texas, where I lived for a while as a kid.

    Huntsville's zip code is 77340, which, when held upside down, spells OhELL.

    And while OhELL might be the best reaction to Huntsville, Texas I've ever seen, poor Leonso Canales would probably not be amused.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The world has gone mad. Simply mad and we're right in the middle of the mad.

    My favorite: Tourist who claimed she was raped in Dubai is charged with extramarital sex – The progressive culture of Dubai is warning married women “Do not get raped” or you will face the consequences. My mind is now Boggled squared!

    I linked you to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  4. "Local Greek governments given up to 2,129 years to repay debt"

    I know who should be our next Sec Treasury....that guy who negotiated the Greek payback deal. Maybe he could get us, oh, I dunno, about a BILLION years to pay ours back? :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hope I didn't break your blog. Got one of those frowny face, bent ear error messages when I posted my comment. Short version, Thanks for the good news at the end. It helps to right the ship.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Nun alcoholic strip club. It's taking some time to wrap my head around this one:)

    ReplyDelete
  7. It would be nice if i could get that long to pay my debts!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm more surprised that someone hasn't demanded to take the "god" out of Good Morning!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Alien hunter ... on Mars... Now Donald Trump is wondering how to build a space wall.

    ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thanks for teaching me some "Greek."

    ReplyDelete
  11. Regular drinking preserves "good cholesterol" levels?

    Big Pharma is gonna start a temperance movement!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Funny thing. . . Muslim countries have the lowest rape statistics in the world. . .

    And, uh. . . what the hell would 'Feminist Snow Plowing System' even mean?

    ReplyDelete

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