Analyze This

 

Analyze This

I may be guilty of Old Fogyism, but I just have to comment. 

Are there any millennials listening? 

Probably not.

Here is the thing, I’m watching the latest episode of “Married at First Sight” (so you know this will be an intellectual opinion) and I am amazed by how much these millennials over analyze EVERYTHING!

“He said such and such, that must mean he isn’t happy.”

No, it just means such and such; stop reading something into EVERYTHING!  

Everything someone says does not have some deeper meaning.

Millennials often have choices for almost everything they do, and apparently these choices all might have major consequences. 

I tell you it must be exhausting when you think every decision you make from where you eat to what book you read might affect you in some way for the rest of your life.  Every gosh dang decision these people make is considered to be possibly life altering.

OK, where you live, what you do to earn a living, how many children might you have, these deserve thought and attention, but even these major events should not leave you paralyzed with fear and indecision.

Yeah, back in the day you lived where you had to live, to work at a job you had to do, and there was often no choice either way.  You had children if you had sex because there were no sure-fire methods to prevent them.  Choice in having children was hormone driven.

Back in the day, (sure sign of old fogyism) it was difficult not having choices, yet in some ways it was liberating.  No need to ponder and worry, you did what you did and it was what it was.

Choices are great until you start to over analyze every choice and worry before and after every decision. 

I wonder if a millennial could even play a game like golf.

“Should I try and hit the ball to the left and avoid the sand trap, or aim right and hope I don’t put it in the woods?  I could aim straight but if it goes too far, I might find the lake.”

“Dude, you going to hit or not?”

“Yes, but this is a tough decision, it might make or ruin my whole day, and if I ruin my day I will be in a bad mood, if I am in a bad mood my wife will notice and think it is something she did.  If my wife thinks it is something she did, it will ruin her day and she will start a fight about it.  She won’t believe my mood is over a golf game and will assume I am cheating on her.  If she thinks I am cheating we will get a divorce.  If I get a divorce, I will lose most of my friends, go into deep depression get fired from my job, and my life will be ruined!”

“You could always take a Mulligan.”  (Golf expression for a do over).

No decision is often worse than a bad decision.  Certainly, over analyzing every decision and worrying even after the fact is not productive.  It may be why therapists are so busy these days.

Millennials need to learn that life will sometimes give you a mulligan and you have to just swing the damn club!

 

 

 

 

 

STUPID HEADLINES 090521

 

STUPID HEADLINES 090521

So many bad headlines, how about some that are just stupid.

 

Emily Ratajkowski Returned to the Runway for the First Time Since Giving Birth in a Hot Pink Thong – Why would anyone give birth wearing a hot pink thong?

 

Rolex watch shortage is a 'perfect storm' – Fortunately I anticipated this shortage and stocked up on Rolex’s along with toilet paper.

 

Woman struts through airport wearing only bikini and mask – Apparently, she made a wrong turn on the way to Wal-Mart.

 

Great blue heron eats a rat in Central Park – If NYC had a few hundred thousand more great blue herons, maybe they could finally control the rat population.

 

Brady Bunch’ star Barry Williams reflects on bonding with his TV family – Here’s a story, of a man named Barry, reflecting on his family from TV…

Indiana football jersey features embarrassing spelling error – “Indiana…what is the origin? Can you use it in a sentence? Indiana…I n d i  n i a.”

Famed Singaporean eatery Hawker Chan loses its Michelin star – I’d check the dumpster in the back.

ABBA to drop first studio album in 40 years – Oh, big deal, just pick the damn thing up.

Drake drops new album 'Certified Lover Boy' – Holy Cow! What the hell, just hold on to your damn albums people!

Mercedes reveals electric luxury models for on-and off-road – If it is electric, I’m pretty sure it will only work when the road is ON.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Almost as Difficult as Crab Fishing in the Bering Sea

 

Almost as Difficult as Crab Fishing in the Bering Sea

 

 

One of my favorite TV shows is “The Deadliest Catch.”  It is about fishing for King and Snow crab in the Bering Sea, Alaska.  These fishermen are out in the most difficult and dangerous conditions, just so the rest of us can enjoy the sweet tasty meat of the crabs they trap.

Yes, they are paid pretty well for what some may think is unskilled labor, but there is a lot of skill involved.  The number one skill is staying alive and out of the freezing water.  They also have to put out fires and repair equipment on the fly in the most difficult conditions imaginable.

Is there a more difficult job in the world?

Maybe not as dangerous in the same way, but the real most difficult job in the world has to be White House Press Secretary.

I can not remember a WHPS in the past that has not been excoriated by at least one half of the country on any and every given day.

When there is good news on the economy, the international front, or on general US living conditions, The President takes the credit and takes a bow. 

The WHPS introduces him.

When there is bad news, or an embarrassing situation for the President, the WHPS gets in front of the nation and tries to put a positive spin on every question.  They have to dip and dodge the tough questions; they have to withhold some information without appearing to be withholding anything.  They have to misinterpret some questions and quickly move on; they have to promise to get back on some questions when they know they will not.  They have to often defend the undefendable, and take most of the blame and heat on themselves. They have to do all this and maintain a cheerful calm positive disposition.

The WHPS knows who will be throwing softball questions, and who will be throwing high hard ones right at their noggin.  They have to take questions from both, to avoid the high hard one is to essentially admit the White House is not in control.

Most of the latest WHPS’s have been women.  Their appearance, somehow becomes as important as their demeanor. In addition to having to answer sometimes impossible questions with a positive spin, and having to defend Presidential actions that they might personally disagree with, they are then belittled, mocked and made fun of on Saturday Night Live.

Sometimes the President gets a pass, the WHPS is always fair game.

The job is much like the crab fishermen.  They have to think on the fly and repair impossible situations with only their wits and guile and courage. 

The fishermen bring us crab.

The WHPS must cover up crap.

You couldn’t pay me enough.  

I do enjoy watching both shows.