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Thursday, August 23, 2018

Identity Theft

Identity Theft

“Good morning, this is Blah, blah, Bla and Bla how may I help you?”

“Yes, I am calling about the sixty-five-cent piece of crap I ordered from you last week, I am wondering when I might expect delivery.”

“Certainly, I will first need a little information.  Your full name, address, birth date and social security number so we can authenticate your order.”

How often in your life does this happen?  You visit a doctor, you order a prescription, you renew your license, you make a reservation, you buy gum…everyone wants you name, address, birthdate and social security number.  You give it because you need to see the doctor, need the prescription, have to have a license, or dammit, you just want some gum!

However, what are you constantly warned about in order to avoid identity theft?

Do not give anyone you name, address, birthdate and social security number as with that information a thief can steal your money, get phony credit cards in your name, ruin your credit, and leave you homeless.

In this age of technology, we are told that our fingerprints are unique and cannot be counterfeited.  Our voice print is unique and cannot be duplicated.  Our DNA is unique and cannot be reproduced.  Why can’t we get things done without giving our personal information to everyone and their great Aunt Tilly in order to exist in the world?  Why can’t we be identified by means that is proven to be unique, safe and secure?

If I need to see a doctor, get a prescription, get a license or buy some gum, you shouldn’t need my name, address, birthdate or social security number.  I should be able to confirm my identity by pressing my thumb on a pad, speaking into a mike, or spitting into a cup.

“I’d like a pack of Dentine please.”

“Certainly, could you just spit in this cup?”

“Sure, Chaa-cha spa-too.”

“Thank you, Mr. Hagy, here you are, that will be a dollar twenty-five.”

“Sure, now could you please just press your thumb on my phone app as my receipt?... Thank you, Miss Jones.”


You all have a nice identity-theft-less day now.


  1. Well you don't need all that to vote. At least anyone can do that. I'm renewing my drivers license today and I'm even bringing my passport. You can't have too much identification. I've had my license since I was 17. You'd think they would know me by now.

    Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺

  2. Yeah, you'd think someone would've figured out how to identify us without all of that stuff by now. Heck, I can recognize me with a single glance.

  3. It's a real concern. Suely we could all be identified with our eyes byb now.....

  4. Maybe if we kick up enough of a fuss, they will start using retina scans or fingerprints (or both). Then again, you’ve conspiracy theory people who won’t want to use those, either. We can’t win!

  5. And why does Office Max need my ZIP CODE when I buy a $12 tri-fold foam board suitable for a science project? I'm RIGHT THERE! It's not like they're going to mail it to me.

    1. Zip code, like our Post Code, is how they track where and how far people will come to shop at that location, then they can work on their demographics and have things those people are more likely to buy. I give a different post code everytime I'm asked for one.

  6. I had an interesting phone call today. My caller ID gave the name and phone number. It was my husband's name and the number was our home phone number. I wasn't at home to answer the call from my own home phone. I called him at work and asked him how he called our home phone with the home phone number. Plus the phone is in my name. How come the caller ID said his name with our number? These are the mysteries of scammers that keep me up at night.

  7. When someone asks if you can identify yourself, can't you just look into a mirror & say, "Yeah--that's me"?

  8. Social Security? Really?
    Oh, wait, I have to show my pensioner ID or Medicare Card when I go to a Doctor or Chemist (drugstore) I don't usually go to. Same thing.

  9. Gosh, I'm glad I don't have to go through all that. Or, looking at it another way, perhaps we should be more careful in my country.

  10. I always choose the simple questions that they want to prove my identity, like father's middle name, name of first pet (I just use name of last pet), etc. Some of those questions are impossible to remember the answers like street I grew up on when I was in elementary school or name of first grade teacher. The safeguards are nice, but sometimes aggravating to jump through all the hoops to prove we are who we say we are.


  11. Don't get me know why we're not using the fail-safe, identity theft proof technology? Because it costs MONEY to implement it, and you know there's no money after the CEOs get their 7-figure incomes. ATMs are still running on Windows 98, because, you know, CEOs...

  12. Heaven help any of us if any of these systems decide we're dead. I've read horror tales of it taking years for people to prove they're still alive, even when they meet officials face-to-face to whom they show all sorts of records.