The First Kill
I am a
non-violent person. I do not like guns,
I do not like hunting. Responsible people
can own guns, that is fine with me. If
you are a hunter, it is fine with me. I
do not like guns and I do not care to hunt…you probably do not like golf, as
long as you do not hunt golfers, it is fine with me.
Anyway,
though I do not like guns and I do not like hunting, I also do not like flies
or other in-the-air, in-the-house insects.
The other
day while picking up some medication at the Rite-Aid, I was browsing through
the as-seen-on-TV section and I saw something I have not seen on TV. An electric fly swatter (EFS)!
You read
that right, an ELECTRIC FLY SWATTER!
This thing
is like a small tennis racket with layers of interlaced wires. The wires are charged with two AA batteries. When the in-the-air insect hits the charged wires,
the claim is they will meet a quick electrocution demise.
Why is this
better that an old fashion swatter (OFFS)?
It is
difficult to nail a fly in the air with an OFFS. If you do nail one, it only stuns it and you
have to find it on the ground and finish him quickly. When you smash a fly with the OFFS, it leaves
a squishy mess where the kill was made.
If it works,
the EFS would be more effective and cleaner, not to mention the extra thrill of
zapping a pest. It occurred to me the
EFS might be particularly effective on fruit flies which are a nuisance in the
fall. Fruit flies never seem to land and
stay still. They are impossible to smack
in the air, kind of like trying to hit a knuckleball with a whiffle-bat.
I bought it…six
bucks, and brought it to our shore rental where flies are often a problem.
When my
grandson Cole saw it, he had many questions.
I explained how it was supposed to work, but that we would need a fly to
test it on. Eight-year-olds don’t wait
for a fly to test an EFS, they test it themselves with their fingers.
EEOWWW! It works! Sparks flew and the EFS was dropped.
I explained
that you should not touch it when the button is pushed. I then demonstrated how if the button was not
pushed you would not get a shock.
EEOWWW! No sparks flew, but apparently the
charge does not disappear as soon as the button is un-pushed. Of course, an eight-year-old would want to
play with this and demonstrate it on his seven-year-old brother. I had to hide the EFS…up high.
This morning
at breakfast we had our first flying intruder.
Out came the swatter. The fly was
then spotted in air. One quick swipe and
ZAP. It works!
Sparks flew,
fly didn’t, there was no mess, grandchildren
giggled, great success.
I hate
flies, but I am kinda hoping to see a few more.
who's the 8 yr old now? by the way, I jumped when he zapped that fly. it makes a loud scary sound. especially if its behind your back and not expected.
ReplyDeleteguess I need to say something stupid so cranky has something to blog about. sorry I've been a slacker.
I know you want to get in on the action.
DeleteAnd stop reading my blog!!
What you REALLY need to do, Mrs. C, is to hide more snacks. I love to hear about Joe's quest, and his resulting comeuppance. Even though we all know what the last word will be.
DeleteAhh ohh....I can see the unintended consequences now. Little brothers everywhere will have another thing to fear about their older brothers. I guess this is just the equivalent 21st Century version of stuffing little brothers in electric clothes dryers.
ReplyDeleteNow I have another gadget to look for. We do get our share of fruit flies at the end of the summer.
ReplyDeleteI want one! I'm a lousy killer of flies. I wonder if a person could 'bait' it?
ReplyDeleteI use Jim as my fly swatter. He's pretty darn good.
ReplyDeleteDoes it work on fishduckies?
ReplyDeleteI bought one of those too and I LOVE that it works! I was a little skeptical but so happy that it does exactly what it's supposed to. Aaanndd.. Much like the 8 yr. old, I too had to touch it to see how it worked. Hahahahaha. :)
ReplyDeleteGlad you found something that works. I wonder if it will work on dogs. I will go looking for me one so glad you mentioned it.
ReplyDeleteI don't like guns hunting or golf...I GOTTA get me one of those.
ReplyDeleteI have two of them and they have lasted for years. Haven't zapped myself yet but I can see however how a boy would couldn't resist zapping his sibling.
ReplyDeleteOh, I want me one of those!
ReplyDelete;)
Sounds like a handy product to have, I dislike flies too especially those huge ones that charge right through the window and refuse to leave. Greetings!
ReplyDeleteMy siblings and I are grown adults, but no one can stop us from beating each other with the electric fly swatters every time the opportunity presents itself.....
ReplyDeleteI laughed out loud at reading this and now I want one too! You should get a commisssion :)
ReplyDeleteThose things are awesome! America's Funniest Videos regularly has 8 year old adults touching their tongues to 'em. It never gets old!
ReplyDeleteIf you have a good supply of batteries, use a sugar solution on the wires, tape down the button, and leave it on the floor where you have a ant problem. They stream to their deep-fried deaths by the hundreds!!
Not that, you know, I've ever done that.
Aw, a new toy. I had not seen this on tv, but it was only a matter of time before it was invented. I mean, I've thought of that gadget myself.
ReplyDeleteA friend at church told me about this. He had a gleam in his eye as he talked about how satisfying it is to nab a bug on the fly this way.
ReplyDeleteWhy was I not informed of this newfangled technology? I need one to carry on my walk up the driveway every evening. Our across-the-road neighbors have horses, and apparently the giant horseflies find me to be slower-moving and without a swishing tail. I would LOVE to fry one of those behemoths. The horseFLIES. Not the horses.
ReplyDeleteWe have one of those somewhere in the bowels of our cabinets. It does work and I know this because we have one in surgery. Yes, flies are not welcome there and we do get them from time to time. I know if you touch the swatter part you will get a shock...how do I know this? Because one of the more educated nurses who's much older than 8 had to try it and see. She's not the same nurse who had to try a skin staple gun to see how it felt. I can't believe we actually employed 2 nurses like that. They have moved on to greener pastures hopefully not in a town near you. Have a good weekend!
ReplyDeleteThat's the trouble with weaponry - once you see how good it works you just want to keep using it!
ReplyDeleteI never actually got to kill a fly with one, but I did have one eventually destroyed when the boys got ahold of ours and acted like your 8 year old ha ha
ReplyDeleteSo the fly doesn't get stuck to the wires when he/she is electrocuted? The you still have to find the tiny corpse and dispose of it. But the good part is you'll be perfecting your tennis swing, you could even get an occasional fly with a backhand stroke.
ReplyDeleteI guess this calls for a trip to the shops on the grounds that I get tired of chasing flies with my swatter.
ReplyDeleteThat little flies guts was sprayed all over your house, but it's great fun. You are officially a member of the SWAT team. Congratulations.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day and weekend. ☺
No guts, the kill was neat and clean.
DeleteI don't notice many flies around here but that device sounds like fun, unless you're the fly of course.
ReplyDeleteYou probably could get quite an aerobic workout with this racket if you visit a swampy area with a dense mosquito population!
ReplyDelete