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Friday, August 2, 2019



I am not a prude.  I am not a racist.  For the most part, words or visuals do not upset me.  I am old, and I am confused about what words are proper today, and what words are forbidden.

For instance:

I get it that you can not say the “N” word, even though clearly everyone knows what the “N” word is so that eventually if you say “The N word” you will offend people.  Soon it will be you have to say “That word” to mean “The N word”.  

Look words are not offensive, it is words in a specific context that are offensive…OK I don’t want to get in a debate, just let me know which words can no longer be used.  Maybe print a list of what is not acceptable, then update the list everyday as the rules seem to change often.

The other day I was corrected in a disciplinary fashion from a young person for using the term “Actress.”  Apparently if you act, you are an “actor.”  Any gender identification is offensive. 

Look, I don’t care, just tell me the rules.

Why on TV can you say Ass, but not asshole?  Can you say ass and hole in the same sentence?  “He was an ass because he dug a hole.”

How come you can’t say “Pussy” but you can say VeJayJay?

Why does “actress” offend, but a commercial can have models demonstrate the superiority of their Vejayjay trimming devise?

Can I say “an actor of unknown gender but I suspect (he/she/it?) may have a vejayjay.”?

When I was a child, we used to play Cowboys and Indians.  I am old.  Sometimes I use the term Indian instead of Native American…or is it Indigenous person?  When I use the term “Indian” do I really need to be corrected?  Is the world worse off if I use a that word?  Are Native Americans better off if I am corrected?

I just saw a commercial advertising a no wrinkle cleaning product that basically claimed their wrinkle free product would hide a 13-year-olds boner.  (Can I say boner?  What about hard-on, or pitched a tent?  I need that list!) It was pretty funny to me, but I’ll bet it offended a lot of other old people.  Probably more than saying “actress” offends a millennial.

The same young people who are offended by “Indian” or “actress” or any number of words that are on their not published list, have no problem using “Fuck” as punctuation. 

I over-hear it in public areas all the time. 

“My fucking boss is so fucking stupid; I want to kick his mother-fucking ass!” 

It is not only offensive to many people, but it has also watered down and ruined a perfectly good word.  “Fuck” used to get your attention and emphasized your point, it has lost its effectiveness.  

These same fuck-punctuating people would have no problem correcting me if they over-heard me say “actress” or “Indian.”

Can I say “mother-fucking indigenous actor person of indeterminant gender?”

I need a list! 


  1. Are we getting enough fiber in our diet Joe? Sometimes a build-up “Down There” can cause people to use politically incorrect language.
    I suggest prunes or perhaps some chic peas:)
    Just kidding. I have to be extremely careful writing for the paper.
    It can be confusing.

  2. The biggest problem is that they wouldn't even be able to agree on the list. Better to just say, "Sorry, i did not intend to offend" and move on.

  3. I ask myself the same question often. I recently started a blog (at 40) and I'm not sure if I need to worry about offending someone. I mean the "n word" is way too far but what if I specify a gender or race? Will i get sued or shut down? Wtf kids. How can the young call me nasty names and i cant call a trans person by their birthed gender?

  4. I learned early-on that you can't say "you people" to a classroom of rural Missouri 9th graders, even though you yourself are a rural Missouri former 9th grader. They act like it is the worst insult they ever heard (I've got news for them!), when you were only shortening a version of "you boys and girls" prior to announcing that they needed to bring their textbook to class every day.

  5. We may need a list but who would be compiling the list and can we trust such a list? Its for things like this that I 'm glad I work at home in somewhat of a bubble. I don't have to be out there trying to figure what to say and what not to say.


  6. I wish I understood why gender identification is so offensive. Why do so many object to being known as either man or woman, actor or actress? We should be rejoicing in differences and uniqueness. The world is not a hotch-potch of persons of indeterminate gender/age/race/ whatever.

  7. FANTASTIC post dear Joe

    i think word with F you mentioned here is being used more than all other normal words which is not decent in my opinion

    years back my eldest son corrected me when i said actress and it took quite time to make me comprehend why so ?

  8. Hahahahahaha. I love this post for so many reasons. First, you know I'm a fan of dropping an F bomb or two but I always think of George Carlin when doing so so I think I get a pass. Hahahaha. Second, if somebody has a list I will most likely never use it unless it is to get tips on how I can offend more people tho I probably don't need much help with that. - Great post. Seriously, people just need to chill.

  9. I really did not know you cannot say the word actress any more. I saw a good actor on TV the other day; she had well developed lungs!

    God bless.

  10. As usual, you've hit the word on the head.....there's been lots of talk about gender lately. Recently read an article on a news website that Berkley is refusing to use gender specific words. Manhole becomes "maintenance hole", because "“Women and nonbinary people are just as deserving of accurate representation.” What the hell is a non-binary person?
    More importantly, don't they have anything better to do?

  11. WE all need a list...either that or we all need sto stop talking.

  12. The gender thing drives me insane. Otherwise, I tend to use the technical terms for things like penis and vagina, so hope that doesn't offend anyone. I always use 'Native American' because it distinguishes them from all the folks from India that live in our area.

  13. I “try” not to offend anybody. When I was growing up there was a word (insult) for every nationality and those words were used without thought. It was equal opportunity cruelty. I don’t know all the rules and I am sure I have unknowingly used expressions that may have hurt, but I can still learn, and that is a good thing.

  14. You're right. Maybe we all need a list of approved words that don't run the risk bruising anyone's overly-sensitive widdle feelings. I never purposely say anything offensive, and a rule of thumb should be, if something I say can either be taken as 1.) innocent or 2.) offensive, assume that I always meant it the first way. Chill, people!

  15. It is hard to keep up but so easy to slip up. There are new offensive terms cropping up each day. Guess the best thing is to become a great listener.

  16. It's a moving target but you can't get genuinely offended unless you find something fresh. The old and stale just will not do!!

  17. I am with you 100% on this one. Enough is enough.

  18. This is hilarious but actually it is problematic for me too so I need the List when it comes out... on a regular basis. I raised a couple of my Special Needs Grandchildren, and am full time Caregiver to my Brain Damaged Spouse who suffered TBI in a catastrophic accident... and so connected to the Community of Caregivers online... and I fucked up apparently and used the word retarded {not in what I thought to be a derogatory way since in my day it was a perfectly acceptable term not meant to offend or hurt someone}... and a Mom of a 'developmentally challenged' Child read me the riot act. I felt bad... even tho' I didn't realize the Word was now taboo... I didn't know... now I do... and there are a host of other previously valid Words you can no longer use lest you cause an offense or someone flips their shit hearing it said. I guess I'm just not PC enough... not that I necessarily wanna be mind you... Good Post Topic!

  19. An important thing is to know your audience. I use language around my co-workers that I would never have used around my in-laws. And with some friends, I can liberally use four-letter words...with others, not so much.

    Your line "...why can you say 'ass' on TV, but not 'asshole'?" reminded me of this:


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