HANDLING A COMPLIMENT

HANDLING A COMPLIMENT

Why is it so hard to accept a compliment?  When is a compliment not really a compliment?  How are men’s compliments different from women’s?  When you compliment someone on their appearance or their talent why it is seldom simply graciously accepted?

Women love compliments from men…if they like the man. 

Chris Rock brilliantly points out is one of his routines that a woman will flirtatiously accept a compliment from an attractive man, but if an ugly guy compliments her it is sexual harassment!  He further points out that this is unfair because there is no such thing as a guy who thinks he is ugly.

Women seldom compliment a man they do not know well.

This is understandable, if a guy gets a compliment from a women he usually thinks he is going to get laid.

When women compliment another woman it is almost always played down:

“I love that dress.” 

Typical response, “Oh this old thing?  I’ve had it for years.”

“Oh, your hair looks so nice.”

 Typical response, “Really, do you like this hair color?  I’m still not sure.”

“This pie is delicious.” 

Typical response, “Do you really like it?  It’s an old recipe I just decided to throw together.”

“Oh, I love your shoes, are they new?”

Typical response, “They’re from ‘Target’, twelve ninety-eight.”

“Your boyfriend is hot!” 

Typical response, “Thanks, you caught him on a good day.”

This is because women’s compliments to other women are often very insincere; compliments are only accepted guardedly. 

Men will accept a compliment from other men.  Men do not often compliment others.  When they do, it is usually sincere:

“Nice shot!” 

The response would never be, “Thanks, it was just luck.”  It would more likely be, “Yeah it was!”

“Dude where’da get the cool duds?”

The response would never be, “What, these old things?”  It would more likely be, “Gottem at “The Men’s Shop’ and they set me back a ton.”

“I gotta tell ya, your girlfriend is hot!”

The response would never be, “Were just friends” or “That’s just my cousin.”  It would almost always be, “Yeah baby!”  Followed by a high five or a fist bump.

Sometimes compliments are difficult to accept because they implicitly put down previous appearance or activity.  This is particularly true if the complimented person is paranoid or highly sensitive.

I.E. “Don’t you look thin!”  (Hmmm, how fat did I used to look?)

Recently my brother e-mailed me on one of my blog posts.  He told me he really liked this post, “It was the best you’ve written so far.”

My instinctive first thought was, “What was wrong with the other 280 posts?”

Why is it so hard to just say, “Thank you, that means a lot?”

THE FOX SQUIRREL

THE FOX SQUIRREL

A “Fishing with Frog” LEGEND

This year’s annual “Fishing with Frog” (see http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2011/05/fishing-with-frog.html) trip is scheduled for early June.  I am looking forward to the fishing, and the comradery (I don’t care Webster; I insist it is a word.)  I am not looking forward to the annual BOS (bag of shit) about my infamous sighting of the mysterious “Fox Squirrel.”

Five years ago while fishing the West Virginia side of the upper Potomac; I spotted a huge squirrel like animal.  I shouted out to Frog and Catfish:

“Holy Shit!  Did you guys see that?”

“See what?”

“It was like a big squirrel only it was hopping through the woods on the other side of the river.  It looked like a small deer with a huge squirrel body.”

Catfish who is the expert on all things that breathe with lungs or gills replied nonchalantly, “Didn't see it, but it sounds like a Fox Squirrel.”

“Fox squirrel?  I never heard of a fox squirrel.”

“They are very common in this area.  They are very large squirrels.”

“Large!”  Three foot large?”

“It was a fox squirrel.”

“Damn”

I am not an expert on animal life like the Catfish, but I am pretty sure I would have heard somewhere about a three foot high squirrel. 

“Are you sure?…This thing was BIG!” 

“A fox squirrel is a big squirrel.”

I let it be for the rest of the trip.  We did meet some locals and I questioned them about really large squirrels in this area.  They immediately responded, “Oh yeah, sounds like a fox squirrel.  We see them in our yard all the time.”

When I returned home, the first thing I did was get on the internet and search for “fox squirrel.”  I found that there is in fact such an animal.  It is the largest of all squirrels growing to almost three pounds.  The pictures I found looked exactly like every squirrel I have ever seen except…maybe…a little bigger than most. 

The creature I saw was not just three pounds.

The next year I told Catfish this thing I saw was no fox squirrel.  It was not three pounds; it was more like 40 pounds.

The Catfish laughed.  Frog laughed.  It was a big joke; a forty pound squirrel!  It is a big joke every year.

“Hay Hagy, watch out for the killer fox squirrel!”

“Did you bring your elephant rifle?  Its fox squirrel season you know.”

I say very freaking funny.  Go ahead guys, make a joke.  I know what I saw.  Now I know how people feel when their spotting of a UFO or Bigfoot is put-down with derisive laughter.

I don’t care if Catfish, Frog or anyone else chooses to make fun of me.

Somewhere on the Maryland side of the upper Potomac River is an animal with a very large squirrel-like body, a squirrel-like fluffy tail, and the legs of a Great Dane.  It hops like a rabbit....I seem to remember large fangs. 

It is NOT a Fox Squirrel!

FOR MORE “FISHING WITH FROG” see:

http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2011/06/fishing-with-frog-ii-part-1-of-3.html  

http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2011/06/fishing-with-frog-ii-part-2.html

http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2011/06/fishing-with-frog-ii-part-3-of-3.html

http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2011/07/birding.html 

   

The Masters - Stupid Golf Slang:

The Masters - Stupid Golf Slang:

I love golf.  I love to play; I love to watch it on TV.  What I don’t love is the stupid golf slang that announcers feel they are required to constantly use.

The MASTERS CHAMPIONSHIP starts tomorrow.  This is my favorite tournament.  Lots of people watch this event.  People who do not understand golf watch it simply because the venue is incredibly beautiful.  Perhaps this year TV announcers will recognize this fact and explain the game in terms that average people can understand.  Stop the cutesy crap!

PLEASE!

Golfers putt with a putter.  Stop calling it THE FLAT STICK.

The area that golfers want to land their drives is called the fairway.  Stop calling it THE SHORT GRASS.

Sand is in a sand trap, it is not the BEACH.  The grass in the rough is tall, but the rough is not called the tall grass.  It is called the ROUGH.  To play golf in Europe you cross the Atlantic Ocean.  It is not a THE POND.

Golfers start a hole hitting a driver, not THE BIG CLUB.  Errant shots land in the water hazard, not THE DRINK.

The announcer most guilty of abusing golf slang is Johnny Miller.  I play the game and I don’t know what the hell he is talking about most of the time.

I know what a chip is.  I know what a pitch and roll is.  Tell me Johnny, what the hell is a “Chunk and Run?”

“He just needs to feather it here.”  Feather it?  Tell me Johnny, what is feathering it?

“This is a spot where I like to just slow swing it.”  Huh?  What?

“These green are Augusta fast.” OK. I understand that one but then Mr. Miller follows with, “They are 13’s maybe 14’s.”  WHAT?  EXPLAIN Johnny EXPLAIN!

Here is a Johnny Miller statement that makes no sense at all.

“Tiger needs a win.  You don’t want to go from no wins to winning a Major, he needs a win” What the frick does that mean.  It almost makes sense until I start to think about it and then….no…It is just a stupid thing to say.

These are more Johnny Miller golf vomitisms I heard this past week:

“That was a little chunky.” (He didn’t hit the ball clean; he hit the ground a bit before he hit the ball.) 

“He got a draw with a fade wind; that is juicy there.” (He tried to curve the ball left into a cross wind.  Juicy?... I got nothing.)

“The wind is against him…well it’s a little greasy, but not that bad.” (I have no idea.)

“He is going to want to cozy-it down with an option to go clunk.”(He wants to make sure this putt does not go past the hole but wants to give it a chance to go in.  I know that is stupid but I think that is what he meant.) 

I know you understand the game like no one else Johnny, but could you please explain it in English?

Maybe I will have to cozy the volume down with an option to go click.