Cranky or Just Petty

 

Cranky or Just Petty

 Mrs. C says I am cranky, maybe… it is just that stupid little things piss me off.

I have almost learned to accept young people who have to say, “No problem” instead of “You’re welcome.” 

To me, “No problem” means “It’s OK, I don’t mind doing something for you that I am paid to do.”

When I say “Thank you” to a wait person and they say “No problem,” I bite my tongue to not reply,

“I did not think it was a problem to bring my order since that is pretty much your job description.”

Fortunately Mrs. C has convinced me that “No problem” is the new “You’re welcome” and I let it slide.

The current aluminum foil on my tooth fillings is the asshats that work at our Recycle Center.

We can recycle our plastics, glass and cardboard every Monday and Friday at our center aptly named “Fort Grumpy.” 

I appreciate that the workers at the center are mostly “Refuse Specialists” (we used to call them Garbagemen) and working the recycle center is not their favorite task. 

They used to be pleasant enough, even helpful, but not since the pandemic.

Since the pandemic they now have to verify upon entry that you are in fact a town resident, and then assure you wear your mask.  They now also have become refuse Nazi’s, following you around as you toss your trash making sure there is not an illegal co-mingling of materials.

Give someone a little power to police and they become asshats.

The other day I was dumping paper from a plastic bag into the paper bin.  The plastic bag does not go in the paper bin, it is tossed elsewhere.

I know this. 

As I was removing the paper from the plastic bag a refuse policeman started yelling from a nearby truck. 

“You cumn’t mumber the bugger wim them pambents!”

“What?”

“You cumn’t mumber the bugger wim them pambents!”

“Excuse me?”

“You cumn’t mumber the bugger wim them pambents!”

“Ok, I won’t mumber the bugger wim them pambents!...no problem!”

Asshats!

A week ago I drove into the center. 

They used to have a dude out front checking your ID.  This day the guy was in a different place and he did not appear to be waiting to check anything.  I drove slowly and he did not make a move, so I continued to drive assuming that checking ID was not an issue like it was not an issue before the pandemic.  (Apparently due to the pandemic there is a fear of people from other townships using our recycle center.)

He gave no indication that he was concerned until he ran after me screaming,

“Stop,  where do you think you are going?”

I stopped and flashed my license proving I was not a criminal while he lectured me about not obeying his non-existent instructions. (There is a sign so…)

Today I drove into the center and the same asshat was waiting.  I stopped, showed him my license and he went over it with a fine tooth comb assuring I was not a miscreant trying to drop Old Bridge refuse in the Sayreville refuse center. 

Of course with a face mask there is no way he could verify it was my picture, but he went through the process anyway before grunting,

“Straight ahead” while pointing straight ahead.

I felt he could have just said, “Thank you.”

I wanted to reply back.

“Really, straight ahead?  Not turn around and go home as that would be the only other option?”

Instead I just told him,

“No problem.”

He is a young guy.  Probably does not know that “No problem” is not today's “Thank you” or “You’re welcome,” but is in reality, Old Peoples',

“Go fuck yourself!”

Made me feel better.