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Monday, May 4, 2020

THE PINKY SPECIALIST

THE PINKY SPECIALIST


Sometimes I look back on my life and I think I never fulfilled my potential.  I was a low level manager at a brokerage firm for forty years.  What a waste.  I should have been a doctor.


I think I would have made a great doctor.  The only issue that probably would have held me back as a doctor is I have always been a little bit lazy.  Doctors have to work hard and they have to know a lot of stuff.


Sometimes I think maybe I could have been a podiatrist.  They only have to know about feet.  How hard could that be?  Feet?  They are really not that complicated.  But then…


There is hammer toe, bunions, flat feet, toe nail problems, arch problems; I would probably even have to know about ankles and stuff.  There are a lot of bones in feet and every one of them can cause problems and require different treatments.  


A podiatrist might have been a bit much for me.  Still, I think I would have made a great doctor.  Maybe I could have just narrowed down my practice.


If I had it to do over again, I would have become a doctor.  I would have been pinky specialist.   What are there; three bones and a nail?  I could have easily learned everything there is to know about the pinky.  You don’t put a broken pinky bone in a cast; you just wrap it with a popsicle stick and some duct tape.  A cut pinky hardly ever needs stiches; generally a band aide will do.  If as a doctor you screw up it is only a pinky.  People can do just fine without a pinky.  A pinky specialist does not have that much pressure.


It is too late for me to go back and start a new career.  It’s too bad.  I think I would have been a great Pinky Specialist.


Dr. Cranky “Pinkies R Us”
re-run from 2013

Sunday, May 3, 2020

Mandate It!


Mandate It!



How will this Covid-19 problem ever be resolved?

Clearly we first need a therapeutic way to treat the disease and save lives.  

Next we need a vaccine to create mass immunities and eventually choke the virus out.

In the meantime,  we need to slow the infection rate to keep hospitals from being overburdened.  We need to quarantine those that are the most susceptible, old people, obese people and people with other conditions that make them most at risk to this virus.

What I have noticed in discussions of steps needed to save us from this pandemic, is the skepticism of finding a therapeutic treatment, and developing a vaccine.  It seems every idea gets instantly shot down as impossible.

Every thing needs to be tested nine ways from Sunday, and every potential breakthrough has not been proved other than anecdotally.

Experts are careful to explain why it is impossible to have a vaccine in less than 18 months,  and why possible therapeutic treatments are too dangerous to be attempted, even on people who are dying.

It harkens me back to my days at a large brokerage firm dealing with security trading and processing.

The industry had many old guard experts who could explain why any new enhancement to the process of trading securities, clearing and delivering securities and pricing sales was completely impossible.

Industry Leaders wanted to clear transactions in 3 days, not 5 days.  Experts explained how that was just not possible without at least several years of development.  

The Stock Exchanges wanted to trade securities in penny increments, not the traditional eight of a dollar.  Experts were very good at explaining why this just could not be done, certainly not without years of programming and testing.  

The industry wanted to eliminate delivery of physical certificates, instead deliveries should be on paper by simple computer transfers from various brokerage firm accounts.  Experts would say to those requesting these changes,

“You just don’t understand the complexities and difficulties involved.”

The brokerage industry and the Exchanges had a solution to overcoming all the difficulties the old guard experts warned of.

They simply mandated the changes.

The experts were told “Just do it, we want it!”

Now, the darnedest thing is that when ever Industry Groups mandated any of these major changes to processing, the changes were implemented within the mandated time frame.

It went like this:

Industry Leaders and Exchanges: “We need XY and Z to improve our process.”

Old Guard Experts: “That would be nice, but it is impossible, you just don’t understand.”

Industry Leaders and Exchanges: “We need it; do it within 6 months. Oh, and It is mandatory.”

Old Guard Experts: “Impossible, if it can be done at all it will take at least two years.”

Industry Leaders and Exchanges: “Six months, and it is mandatory, any firm not in compliance will be fined and probably go out of business.”

Occasionally the time frame was extended a few months, but processes that were deemed by experts as impossible were developed time and time again simply because those process changes were mandated.

It is amazing what smart people can accomplish when they are challenged and when something simply HAS to be done.

It was a Wall Street joke, that the way to do the impossible is to simply mandate it!

The solution to Covid-19 is simple.  We need a therapeutic drug to treat people until a vaccine is developed and we need a vaccine soon.

Just get all the drug companies together and  tell them we need a therapeutic drug within 6 weeks, and a vaccine by this fall.
 
Then tell them it is MANDATORY!

It worked on Wall Street, why not the world?


Saturday, May 2, 2020

Goal Met, Goal Missed


Goal Met, Goal Missed

I had set two goals to reach by my birthday.  Made one, missed the other.
 
I have lost so far, in about 6 weeks, 9 pounds;  six pounds short of my goal.

There is no reason to quit the diet, I still aim to reach my weight, just not as quickly as I wanted.

Of course the gym was closed, so that made it a little harder, and I have been confined to within 20 yards of the refrigerator for the whole 6 weeks, so everything considered I’ve done OK.

I did reach my other goal today.  

I sent video proof to my Phys Ed/ health consultant son.  That goal was not easy.
 
The goal was push-ups, one for each year of my birthday.
 
I did  selfie videos of my attempts.   One time I thought I reached my goal plus an extra eight for good measure.  Then I counted them on the video. 
I was 2 short.

It seems doing them and counting at the same time is not that easy.
 
I did finally make the number, plus three more because there is always some clown who claims some were not proper, perfect, military push-ups.

I told my son, they were done fast, and no, I did not touch my chest to the ground on everyone, actually not on a single one.
 
I also didn’t have a heart attack.

That’s all I’ve got today.

Stay safe and wash your hands!