OLD CARS

OLD CARS

This cranky re-run is from Jun3 2013

Where have all the old cars gone?  While driving around the other day, on the highway, through the streets and in the mall lot I noticed something, or I didn’t notice something, there are no more old cars on the road.  Well I am sure there are old cars, but they are hard to spot these days.

Years ago old cars were easy to spot.  Every car maker changed their designs each year. There were only a few manufacturers, so every kid over age seven could identify any car by make, model and year.  If a car was old, you knew it was old and you knew exactly how old it was.

“Damn, look at that ’49 Ford coup…still running.  Man if I had that baby I would chop it, nose it, lower it, and add some duel exhausts.”

You could also tell old cars because they burned oil like there was no tomorrow.  From miles away you could spot (or smell) an old car. 

Old cars used to rust after about three years.  If you did not wash it, and wax it every week or two the old paint jobs would not hold up and old cars would rust away.  Apparently paint jobs today are far superior.  I had a red jeep for fifteen years.  I washed it by leaving it out in the rain, and never waxed it.  When I turned it in there was not a spot of rust on it. When is the last time you heard the term “rust bucket?”

Some old cars used to have vinyl roofs.  These were really sharp looking for about two years.  After two years, even if you Armor-Alled regularly these tops turned to dust and underneath the rust came shinning through.

You used to be able to hear an old car from miles away.  It has been years since I’ve heard a car sputter or backfire.

What happened to old cars?  I think competition from abroad has forced manufacturers to improve their paint finish and technology has improved efficiency and dependability of engines.  Government regulations with respect to emissions and safety have undoubtedly taken “old cars” off the road and helped the development of better longer lasting cars. Maybe it is good that government does sometimes force improvements down our throats.

I’m not complaining, merely observing.  I know there are plenty of old cars on the road, but they are just not as “old” as old cars used to be.   

What Are the Odds

What Are the Odds

A certain blogging friend often sees ladybugs.  These sightings remind her of her mother who had a history with ladybugs.  I often see the digital clock when it hits the time 11:11. I have been told this is a sign that our loved ones of times past are still with us.  (See 11:11 http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2015/07/1111.html ).

Seems silly doesn’t it.  Many of us probably often see ladybugs and think nothing of it.  As a matter of fact, the last two weeks while on vacation I saw ladybugs several times.  They were on the pattern of the china on our cruise ship (I almost called it a boat, I think Skip would have called me on that), and I saw them on several tourist tchotchkes in souvenir shops.  I’m sure I wouldn’t have noticed them except for a certain Valedictorian.

If our loved ones wanted to make their presence known, surely they would leave a sign that was a bit more obvious than ladybugs, or the 11:11 time.

Today, the first day back from our trip to Alaska, I descended to my basement man-cave to catch up on my guitar practice.  In the basement, we have three clocks.  Two are analog, and one is digital.  One analog clock has no battery and always reads 10:15. The other analog clock has not been moved forward for daylight savings time.  As I sat down and tuned my guitar, I looked to check out the time.  I first looked at the battery-less clock reading 10:15, I realized this was not a working clock and looked at the other analog clock.  It also read 10:15. What are the odds that I would check the time when the working non-adjusted clock read the exact same time as the non-working clock?  Was this a sign? 

Ridiculous.

I then looked at the digital clock on the TV cable box, a time which is always accurate. 

The moment I looked at this clock, the last digit rolled over to show the correct time was 11:11.

What are the odds? 

Mom; Pop; Jim?

SAVING KRYPTON

SAVING KRYPTON

This cranky re-run is from May 2013

I visited Frog this week, 3 hours away in Maryland, to play a round of golf.  During this visit I noticed a certificate given to Frog for “Heroism above and beyond the call of duty.”  It was issued by his two teenage boys.

“Ok Frog, what is up with the certificate?”

Frog was obviously very proud of the story that followed:

It seems that the two Tadpoles had three goldfish that they had won at a carnival several years ago.  One died of unknown causes.  The other died trying to make a run for it to the small stream that runs behind Frog’s house.  This desperate fish had jumped out of his bowl and flopped across the room only to be stopped by a closed door.  He died some one quarter of a mile and a closed door away from fish freedom.

The third fish was named Krypton after Superman’s home planet because of its seemingly indestructible quality. 

(I know...Planet Krypton blew up!  Hey, I didn't name the fish.) 

In the aftermath of Super-storm Sandy the Frog family was without power.  They stayed with a friend who hadn't lost power.  On the fourth day after the storm, Frog realized Krypton’s bubbler would not be operating, and he may be running out of oxygenated water.

Frog checked up on the fish and found him listing heavy to the right.  Krypton was lightly flipping one side flipper, but he was clearly only minutes away from being flushed to eternity.

“So, thinking quickly, I ran to the kitchen and…”  

“Grabbed a straw to give Krypton straw to bowl resuscitation?”

“Yeah, how did you know?”

“Years ago, I was feeding a neighbor’s Betta fish while they were on vacation.  On the fourth day I found the fish just about belly up in rather dirty water.  I blew fresh air through a straw until the fish came to life.  I then put clean fresh water into his bowl after I let the water get to room temperature.  The fish lived, though he might have suffered some brain damage.”

“Well Krypton is still just fine…I guess in an emergency great minds think alike.”

“Yeah, but I never got a certificate!”

Real heroes don’t need accolades.