It was 1
AM. Mrs. C and I had put away our PC’s. The TV and cable were set to go off in 90
minutes, and our latest favorite falling asleep in bed show “The Walton’s” was
on.
“Good night
Mrs. C.”
“Good
night Cranky Old Man.”
Before I
drifted off to sleep a shadow passed over the light cast by the TV set. It was huge.
“Wake
up! There is a large bat in the room!”
It passed
the set again, just a moth.
“It’s
just a moth, it won’t hurt anything, go to sleep.”
“I can’t
sleep with that thing in the room.”
I got out of
bed, grabbed my electric swatter and with my hobbled bad back gait set off to electrocute
the intruder.
Hitting a
moth with a swatter is like making contact with a Phil Niekro knuckleball. It ain’t easy. I flailed away and several times almost fell
over in the attempt. Finally it flew above
then on top the headboard on the bed.
I climbed
gingerly up the bed ready to take on Mothra.
He was gone.
“He’s
gone, go to sleep.”
I went back
to bed.
“Not with
that creature still in the room…wait; there he is again in front of the TV.”
We both crawled
out of bed, Mrs. C now with the electric swatter, I grabbed a magazine. We were about to pounce when the TV went
temporarily blank for a commercial break and Mothra disappeared.
“CRAP!”
“Just
wait, he will be back.”
And after a
few minutes he did come back to that moth attracting TV light. I went to swat it against the screen.
“If you
break the TV, I will kill you!”
I held up
and Mrs. C trapped it resting on the TV stand but blocked so she could not
press down to electrocute the beast.
“Get a
tissue!”
“Let me
smack it.”
“GET A
TISSUE!”
I quick
grabbed a tissue and as she lifted the trapping swatter I tissued the
creature.
Mothra squished
and flushed down the toilet; we went back to bed.
Mrs. C was
asleep in about 12 seconds because she can just do that.
I had mass
quantities of adrenaline rushing through my veins. I had to re-adjust the TV and cable timers and
was up for two episodes of “The Walton’s” before I finally fell asleep.
It is never
dull around the Cranky House.
I agree. It is difficult to get to sleep with such flying creatures in the house. Once I stayed at home and did not go to pick up my wife from the railway station because there was a wasp in the porch by the front door. She rang me on the cell phone to find where I was and I told her to walk home. I was not going to risk my life against a wasp. When you compare a wife to a wasp - a wasp is more dangerous.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
Sounds like you two worked pretty well as a team. Bet you look at the toilet a little funny for a few days. Did he really go down or is he hiding under the lid?
ReplyDeleteDebugging in the dark - funny.
ReplyDeleteSo true, never a dull moment!
ReplyDeletebetty
Funny.I can't sleep with things flying in my bedroom either. We do have a cat - and she usually takes care of them for us.
ReplyDeleteGood thing you got it! There might have been a kerfuffle if Mothra tried to get in your sleeping mouth at the same time as one of those 8 spiders that we allegedly swallow every year!
ReplyDeleteI don't bother chasing moths. I close the door and leave the room while a canful of insecticide does the job, then I find the corpse and chuck it in the bin and air out the room before going back to bed.
ReplyDeleteThat's my Sweetie when there is a fly in the room. "It's strafing me!" keeps yelling. Good work on getting it, by the way, you are a great team.
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha! Moths or spiders or anything creepy crawly in my bedroom and I'm sleeping on the couch!
ReplyDeletehaha
ReplyDeletethat was funny and amusing story dear Joe
i am sorry for disturbance of sleep but still the way you tell i love it
we have garden ,specially moth and insects in monsoon and winter are in abundance ,when we were new here kids were not happy with these creatures but now we are used to