I Can’t Sweep
Not a typo, apparently,
I can’t sweep.
Jersey had
it’s first snow in several years. Almost
two inches of white stuff which got the weather people excited and the Home
Owners Association in full gear. Streets
were plowed as the first flakes were falling, and paths salted and resalted.
I have a
feeling the crew hired by the HOA gets paid by the hour and they are starving
for a Winter payday.
It is nice
that all this stuff is taken care of, at least our stupid high monthly fee gets
us something besides signs all over telling us what not to do, but do they have
to shovel salt on our covered front entrance?
No snow gets
passed our entrance roof. There is no
ice where there is no snow, but the salt does get tracked into and throughout
the house.
Hence the
salt must be swept away from this area.
Yesterday,
before we were having dinner, I took it on myself to complete this chore. When done I made sure to take credit from
Mrs. C for taking charge.
“They salted
the entrance again, but I swept it away.”
I was expecting
an, “Oh, thanks, I hate it when the salt gets tracked inside.”
Instead, I
got, “Did you use the outside broom?”
“What?”
“Did you
use the broom from the garage?”
“No! I
used the broom from the closet. I would
have had to stomp in the cold 30 yards to the garage to get that broom, all to
go swish, swish, done!”
“The
inside broom is for inside only!”
“A broom
is a frickin broom, there is no harm to your damn inside broom!”
“There is
an inside broom for inside and an outside broom for the outside, don’t use the
inside broom for outside!”
“Go check
your inside broom, if you can show me any issue with me using it outside, I’ll
buy another G-Damn broom!”
“That’s
not the point.”
Taking a
different tack, “When was the last time you used the inside broom, as we
have the electric sweeper thing?”
“I don’t know.”
“Guess.”
“Maybe
two years.”
“I rest
my case.”
“You have
no case, just use the right broom in the right place.”
“I get
the scissor thing, one for outside, one for kitchen and one just for paper…well
I don’t really get it, but I can deal with it, but this broom thing is beyond
me.”
“Just don’t
use the inside broom on the outside.”
“Fine,
can we just eat now?”
“Yes.”
“Which are
the inside knives and forks?”
“You’re a
jerk!”
PB (post
blog) We are
expecting snow again in two days, HOA salted the front again. This time I’ll use the outside broom.
