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Sunday, June 26, 2016

OLD STUFF

OLD STUFF
This cranky re-run is from June 2012


 My recent wordless Wednesday post of an old TV test pattern woke up some distant memories. 

To all my fellow “Old Farts” in bloggyland, do you remember any of this stuff?

Adjusting the “rabbit ears” on the TV only to have the reception turn to snow when you moved back to your seat.

UHF channels.

The entire neighborhood getting excited whenever anyone came home with a new car or a color TV.

Regular home deliveries of Milk, soda, beer, and dry cleaning.

Doctor’s house calls…(happened maybe twice.)

The paper stopper on milk bottles that had a little flip-up tab. The tab had to be pried open with a butter knife which invariably forced the stopper into the bottle and squirted milk all over the table.

Milk bottles.

Cream on the top of non-homogenized milk.

Your mom talking about remembering the street “lamp lighter” guy.

Playing in the street.

Picking up the phone and having the operator ask “number please.” (Ocean City, New Jersey did not move to direct dial until the 60’s)

Telling the operator the number (four digits) and having her ask, “and how is your grandmother, Joe?”

Seven-cent Good Humor Raspberry-one-stick ice pops.

Paper boy calling out the latest edition, “Get your two star, sports Fi…nal Bulletin.” (Ocean City, New Jersey again)

Turning wire hangers with cardboard inserts from the dry-cleaner into a bow and arrow.

Being called into dinner by mom’s old two pound bell… and everyone knew their mom’s bell.

Catching crawfish in the creek.  (The one running past Aunt Nancy’s house.)

Smoking on an airplane.

Fumbling with a bra fastener….wait….that was last week.


Using a clothespin and a card (baseball or playing) to turn your bicycle into a “motor” cycle


Old stuff question:
What is a church key?

What old stuff do you remember?

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Stupid Headlines 062616

Stupid Headlines 062616

It is time again for
That's just wrong!

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.  

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Microsoft is testing a new mosquito trap to fight Zika – Makes sense, my computer runs on Microsoft Windows, and it catches bugs all the time.

Axe-throwing club wants a liquor license – Cause axe-throwing and liquor go together like blow torches and dynamite.
Texas woman wakes up with British accent after common jaw surgery – Apparently the surgery also included a stiff upper lip.
Same-sex marriages in US up, domestic partnerships down – Well they have only recently been deemed legal, so why is this a surprise.  I’ll bet sales of Cuban cigars will also be up this year.

Movement on a vast scale detected near San Andreas fault – Maybe Oprah shouldn’t eat bread every day!
Judge rules Texas prison must provide inmates with safe-drinking water – I’m not I favor of mollycoddling prisoners, but I think providing non-poisonous water is reasonable.
Clinton IT specialist invokes 5th more than 125 times – Big deal, I used to take a fifth every night…now I just have an occasional glass of wine.
Solar-powered plane lands in Spain – The plane in Spain landed mainly cause it rained.
Bank employees publicly spanked for poor performance – Hmmm, I think I’d prefer to just give my notice by kicking this shithead boss’s ass.
Despite Latino surge, Asians remain U.S.'s fastest growing racial group – Coming around the final turn its Asians followed by Latinos with the Middle-east driving hard, and Latinos are surging; coming to the finish its Asians…Latinos…Asians and at the finish it’s ASIANS!!

Serbia Asks People To Please Stop Throwing Their Grenades In The Garbage – Or at least duck tape the pin.  (Thank you Fran)

Woman Calls Police Over Not Enough Cheese On Her Pizza – If you think this is a problem, you should be a Garbage man in Serbia! (Thanks Marty)

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Come back next week for more


STUPID HEADLINES

Friday, June 24, 2016

OLYMPIC FEVER 98.9


OLYMPIC FEVER 98.9


A cranky opinion for

CRANKY OPINION SATURDAY

The following is the opinion of a cranky old man with little knowledge of the topic opined.  Opposing opinions are welcome, but they are wrong.  As always, please, no name calling, and that means you, you big stupid head!



Apparently the 906th Olympic Games start this summer in Rio De Janeiro which is a little south of New Jersey.  I know about this event because in the news I read all about a Zika virus that is scary as shit.  Seems a lot of it is going around in Rio.  I also read about the pollution (air and water) that is scary as shit, and rampant crime which is…that’s right, scary as shit.

Today I hear Rory McElroy one of the best golfers in the world is not going to participate in the Olympics basically because among other things, the venue is scary as shit.

Years ago, when the Olympics were first telecast worldwide, the Olympics were a huge thing.  To win a gold medal was to be a superstar.  No one would ever think to avoid the Olympics when even a medal in fencing, sailing or hop scotch would put you on a Wheaties box…today not so much. 

What has changed?

First of all the Olympic athletes of old were all amateurs,  people who made the supreme sacrifice of postponing life for the chance to win a medal.  If a participant twisted his ankle in his first heat it was a tragic story as he would never have another chance.  Jim Thorpe had all his medals taken away when it was found he played “Professional” baseball and earned $1.35 before the Olympic Games…these people were serious.

Today these “amateurs” are supported and paid to train and participate.  They don’t postpone their life for sport; sport is their life and their occupation.  Maybe not the fencers, sailors and hop scotchers, but the athletes for any sport anyone really cares about.

So when a great golfer like McElroy refuses to represent his country, who really cares.  He represents his country in every tournament he plays.  Golf is now international.  Every big tournament is worldwide.  Soccer is worldwide.  Basketball has players from many nations in the NBA.  Track and field athletes from all over the world are on scholarships and represent US Colleges in NCAA competition.

I don’t know about the rest of the world, but I don’t care anymore. 

There is no Al Oerter who after working all day spent hours training and lifting weights so he could try and win the discus throw five times over a 20 years period of time; all without support from anyone except his family.

It is no longer politically correct to root exclusively for your own countrymen.  The chant of USA, USA, USA is a little annoying when you know your guy is taking the same steroids as their guy and is just as professional as their guy and though he may be American, he is quite possibly an American Dick!

I can’t get excited when a swimmer wins his 73rd gold medal in his fourteenth Olympics.  He is not making sacrifices, it is his job.  He doesn’t have to hope to be Tarzan in the movies, he is already rich. And besides, he is a swimmer…big whoop.

Does anyone watch swimming between the Olympics?  How about sailing? Fencing anyone? Track and Field? Olympic style Wrestling? Anyone?  Hell these events are not even broadcast on ESPN 6.

So to all you medal winners, congratulations, enjoy, but I will not be watching.  Oh…and that medal is only gold plated.

The preceding was the opinion of a cranky old man and not necessarily that of management…Mrs. Cranky.