Headlines 043012

Headlines 043012

The Crankys are chillin in Bermuda, but I still have time for this week’s silly headlines and my stupid, sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.

2 arrested for allegedly planting deadly booby traps on Utah walking trail – Everyone knows that booby’s are not in season until May!

Va. couple accidentally shot at gun safety class – Husband and wife both will receive a failing grade.

Man Wished to Have Wife Murdered as a Birthday Present – Wife was hoping for a fur coat instead.

Woman Spills Yogurt on Obama – Turns out the President is anti-probiotic

Tour bus features porn star, free breast exams – Sign me up!

North Korea claims to have 'mobile weapons' capable of striking US – Oh YEAH….well we have FOOD!!

Tennessee bar to livestream Sunday church sermon – They will be serving red wine only, in very tiny cups; wafers in bowls will be offered on the bar.

Does the G-spot exist? New study fuels debate – Experts claim it is right between the F-spot and the H-spot, but for some unknown reason men cannot find it.

Key prosecution witness in Edwards' trial Young set for more grilling – Oops! Nevermind, I thought it said GIRLing. ….Had a good one for that!

Iranian naval admiral: ‘If needed, we can move to within three miles of New York’ - Theoretically yes, but property taxes are really high, and goats are not allowed.

Is slow growth actually good for the economy? – Apparently it is if you are running for reelection.