GUARANTEES

GUARANTEES

This post almost made it to delete, but I am running out of material and Saturday is a slow day so here it is.  My apologies, better stuff (I think) is coming next week.

Mrs. Cranky and I bought a new dishwasher this week.  It is a brand new Whirlpool purchased from Sears for $500.  The salesman explained how this unit was efficient, quiet, and left the dishes clean and dry.  I was not so interested in efficient and quiet; clean and dry got my attention.  Our current dishwasher is quiet, I guess it is efficient, but it does not clean or dry the dishes.  I wanted to replace our dish-rinser with a dish washer. 

The salesman extolled the virtues and the reliability of this machine.  He then tried to sell me a three year guarantee for one hundred and twenty-five dollars.

I thought that was rather expensive, and told the salesman as much.

“If this machine is so reliable, why would I need to pay an extra 25% for insurance that it will work?”

“Do you know how expensive it is to call a repairman?”

“No, because I have not had an appliance break down in less than three years after purchase since they stopped making TV’s with tubes.  Does your guarantee pay for a new machine, or a prorated machine?  Is everything guaranteed or just the parts that never break and do you guarantee that I will be able to find the freaking guarantee three years from now to prove that I paid for it in the first place?”

“Well…”

“I have my own guarantee.  If this thing breaks down in less than one year, I guarantee I will be marching through this store with a ‘Sears Sucks’ sign until I get my money back or you have me arrested.  Further, can you guarantee Sears will still be in business in three years?  Have you seen your stock lately?

“Then I guess you don’t want the guarantee?”

“No thank you.”

Do you buy a guarantee because it is a good idea or because you feel not buying it will jinx the product?