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Saturday, May 6, 2017

STUPID HEADLINES 050717

STUPID HEADLINES 050717
It’s time again for
The guns do need to have a silencer
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
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Yale grad students' 'hunger strike' apparently involves eating when hungry – And if that doesn’t work, they will hold their breath until they feel discomfort.
Wild Boars Go on Rampage in Iraq, Kill Three ISIS Jihadists – This almost made the Feel-Good story of the week.
United cremated giant bunny without her permission – If I was still doing a find the fake news story, I would definitely choose this as the fake…it’s real.
Bacteria-laden mosquitoes unleashed in Florida to combat virus – Somehow this does not sound like a very good idea!*
Colorado animal sanctuary kills all its animals - sanc·tu·ar·y: a place of refuge or safety…maybe not!
High school senior doesn't have date for prom, she takes Harvard acceptance letter instead – Acceptance to Harvard is better than a date with a pimply faced 18 year-old any day.
Kansas City Catholics banish Girl Scouts and their cookies – The heck with the cookies, who are the Kansas City Catholics?  If that is a minor league baseball team, I find the name offensive.  Do they wear funny Pope hats on the field?
Bombay Sapphire Gin recalled after bottles discovered to contain 77 percent alcohol – After a couple of shots of 77 percent (100 proof is 50%) I’m pretty sure I couldn’t recall anything!
'DWTS'' David Ross' dance partner farts in his face – One, two, poof-poof-poof.
Library fines too stressful for Harvard students – If library fines are stressful, how the heck do these kids make it through final exams?
*Actually, the unleashed mosquitoes are sterile males that do not bite.  They will hopefully mate and the eggs will not hatch…them scientists are pretty slick!
The Feel-Good story of the week:
Canadian Crowd Belts Out U.S. National Anthem When Mic Fails – “Oh Canada”…we love ya!
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COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR MORE
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

18 comments:

  1. I guess those Yale students know how to GO on a hunger strike. They just don't know how to STAY on a hunger strike. Kind of like an airport rental car agency knows how to TAKE a reservation, but not how to HOLD a reservation...

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  2. The visual of the Kansas City Catholics will have me giggling all day.

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  3. They sure did 'belt it out'....makes 'ya proud don't it?

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    1. It's also kind of scary that we know all the words to yours....do you know ours?

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    2. "O Canada, la la la la la la, la la la la, la la la, la, la, la the"

      But we still love ya!

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  4. The world gets crazier and crazier doesn't it. Yes it does.

    I linked you to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺

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  5. Think wild boars doing anything in Iraq is surprising, how dare they?

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  6. Being a Michigan girl, the Canadians have always had a special place in our hearts so I am not at all surprised at their camaraderie in the stands. Makes me smile. :) - And really, who are the Kansas City Catholics?? Did Raquel Welsh convert and take the whole roller derby team with her??? :) - Great headlines. The DWTS farting... Eeewww...

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  7. I ALWAYS love your headlines posts!!

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  8. "Yale grad students' 'hunger strike' apparently involves eating when hungry."

    Yeah, sacrifice is a foreign concept to these Snowflakes.

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  9. Do ya suppose wild boars are our new WMD? Clever if they are.

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  10. El Chapo is better at hiding it than our government is at finding it -- why does that not surprise me?

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  11. Glad you got another Florida headline into your "Stupid Headlines" post!

    Read this for a stupid headline that really hit close to home:

    http://www.12newsnow.com/news/shoplifting-suspect-impales-self-with-stolen-knife-police-say/437638690

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  12. I really laughed at the wild boars incident killing ISIS terrorists. Too bad Moslems don't eat pork.

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    1. But apparently, pork eats Muslims. . . (*ba-doomp!*)

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  13. Hmmm. . . At Yale, they fast until they get hungry; at Harvard, they get panic attacks over library fines. . . Maybe it's an Ivy League thing. . .

    But honestly, I don't know what's so threatening about library fines; just bring your gun. . .

    My wife and I were once given free Canadian flags for singing 'O Canada' to the Canadian Chamber of Commerce folks at a Canada Day festival in Up North, Michigan. . .

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  14. Funny and disturbing headlines; students on a hunger strike eating when hungry sounds so true, just to mention one of the headlines.

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