THE CRANKY OLD MAN
Random thoughts and stuff from a cranky old man. Humor (maybe), satire, and some politics, mostly stuff from a confused head.
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Sunday, October 23, 2016
STUPID HEADLINES 102416
It is time
Stupid Headline Sunday
(on a Monday)
This week’s stupid headlines
and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
Man reportedly has penis removed
after allegedly getting it stuck in a bottle –OK, it is embarrassing enough to get your penis stuck in a
bottle, but to leave it in until it got gangrenous andhad to be amputated?Seriously dude, “In case of an emergency, break the glass!”
400 pounds of marijuana found floating
off the Florida Keys – Locals claim they were catching snapper in the area using potato chips
Bob Dylan remains silent on Nobel
Prize win – He was
contacted, but claimed “it ain’t me you’re looking for babe, it ain’t me you’re
GOP sources: Trump still competing
in Virginia – Actually this is not a stupid headline, but I had a really funny
comment for my original reading.
Scientists Accidentally Discover
Efficient Process to Turn CO2 Into Ethanol –Problem solved!I’ve been saying
for a while if there is a problem, the solution is not in conservation and
sacrifice, but for smart people to turn co2 into something useful.
Electric spoon could make veggies
taste like chocolate or cheeseburgers –Because
“Eat your peas, children are starving in China” doesn’t work anymore!
Authorities reportedly warn election
officials about Russian hackers faking fraud –So they beat up Trump for suggesting the election may be
tainted, while they debunk proof of fraud before it even exists…these guys are
Democratic campaign bus
dumps sewage into Georgia storm drain – Kind of a metaphor for the whole campaign!Both sides…relax Liberals!
10,000 endangered 'scrotum' frogs
found dead near Lake Titicaca – I hate to use a tragedy in a Stupid Headline post.It is horrible what is happening in this
lake…however, how often does your 13 y-o-self find “scrotum” “Titi” and “caca,”
all in the same headline?
Bill de Blasio on Donald Trump
election rigging concern: 'We've seen this before. This is what fascists do' – Actually I think fascists do the
rigging!(This comment is in no way claiming the election will
Man charged for beating bus driver
with bag of frozen chicken – Just one more example of why we must have stronger
frozen chicken control laws!