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Saturday, August 6, 2016

STUPID HEADLINES 080716

STUPID HEADLINES 080716
It is time again for
Oh That NY Post
 
 
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
 
 
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
 
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Woman Puts Poison On Her Vagina To Kill Her Husband When He Went Down On Her – Lick on sick chick kills quick.
 
 
This rare disease brews beer in your stomach – “Yes officer, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.”
 

Dog crashes car into West Virginia Walmart – I’ve got nothing that can top this line in the actual story “A second dog riding shotgun somehow rolled down the passenger window after the collision.”

 

Most of world’s biggest beasts could be extinct by 2100 – This is horrible, worse than global warming…what…Oh, beastsnever mind

 

Virginia cops bust drivers for driving without ice cream DWIC; it’s only illegal on a hot day.
 
 

Police in New York hunt bandits who made off with pet bunny – Clearly a slow crime day in the City.

 

Woman refused entry to Six Flags for wearing T-shirt – Well yeah, everyone knows Wednesday is “bare your tits Wednesday” at Six Flags!
 
 
Man Carrying an UZI in Downtown Hagerstown Held on 200K Bond- Can’t a man hunt deer downtown anymore?
 
 
California Deems August ‘Muslim Appreciation and Awareness Month.’ – A month? Not to be politically incorrect, but Jews and Christians don’t get a month …Hell bacon only gets one day! Also, what about separation of Church and State, where is the ACLU?
 
 
Man gets prison for poaching nearly 1,000 Venus Flytraps ...Doesn't everyone know it is just wrong to poach Venus flytraps? They should be lightly salted and fried.
 
This job interview question was just banned in Massachusetts – “Do you know how to paak a caar?”
 
Bionic butt could lead to better prostrate exams – The six-million dollar can?
 
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Come back next week for more
 
STUPID HEADLINES

14 comments:

  1. The joyriding dogs headline was fantastic.

    But it's also nice to know how appreciated I am in California. I wonder what I did to be so appreciated.

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  2. There are a few people i know who'd love to have "the beer brewed itself in my stomach, i have a disease" as their excuse!

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  3. Your comments are far funnier than the headlines. I linked this post to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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  4. So you can brew beer in your stomach? Really? Do you first have to eat a hops and barley salad, and wash it down with some pure, Rocky Mountain spring water? ;)

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  5. This rare disease of beer brewing in your stomach is something new.

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  6. I missed beasts at first glance also probably because of whose blog I am reading. Think that is called a conditioned response to your post.

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  7. I always look forward to your funny comments on these headlines.

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  8. While my 13-year-old-self would appreciate the extinction of the biggest beasts, and the bare-your-tits Wednesday at Six Flags...I had to prohibit that self from reading your post this week, due to entry though the poison vagina!

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  9. There are so many easier ways to kill your husband...

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