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Saturday, July 9, 2016

STUPID HEADLINES 071016


STUPID HEADLINES 071016

It is time again for
They wavered a bit on the adultery thing


STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY




This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.  



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Two charged after video shows man jumping on swimming moose – This sounds like the first episode for “Moose Week” on the Discovery channel.

Dolly Parton clarifies Hillary Clinton 'endorsement' – Says she prefers “The Donald” because his name has 2 D’s.


Why Is Hillary Clinton Using Air Force One On The Campaign Trail? – Because the “Lolita Express” isn’t available.


Would-be carjacker foiled by stick shift – He’s an idiot in the clutch.


Tampa Bay Buccaneer wakes up locked in museum after his friend's wedding – Why is this news…who hasn’t woken up locked in a museum after a wedding?


Here's why 2016 will have an extra second – The good news is this delays Social Security going bankrupt.

Lindsay Lohan turning 30 and writing a book – But first she plans to read a book.


U.S. has highest car crash death rate – Democrats hold sit-it to force more car control regulations.


BMW promises fully driverless cars by 2021 – They’re already pretty close, most BMW’s are driven by assholes now.


Woman pleads guilty to having sex so loudly, it shook neighbor's furniture – One time we wrinkled the sheets.



Noah’s Ark Theme Park Destroyed In A Flood – I guess they didn’t get enough warning…and they were going to have a BOGO on opening day.*

Fire Destroys Great Cacapon Volunteer Fire Station – Perhaps the fire station shouldn’t have volunteered.  (Keep them coming Frog.)

*Oops! Turns out this was a goof, never happened.

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Come back next week for more







STUPID HEADLINES

12 comments:

  1. As usual I linked you to Silly Sunday. Your comments are always funny.

    Have a fabulous day Joe. ☺

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  2. I love your Stupid Headlines posts!!

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  3. "...most BMW’s are driven by assholes..."

    That's true.
    When I stopped being an asshole I stopped wanting a BMW.

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  4. I got so excited about Noah's Ark being destroyed by a flood that I had to Google it. Turns out that's a fake story. Darn!

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  5. There's always some nut trying to steal an expensive sports car and can't because he's not smart enough to drive a standard transmission. You'd think they'd give up!

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  6. Hadn't heard about Dolly--had to check that one out. Funny about double D's.

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  7. Moose Week? They might get better ratings with Furniture-Moving Sex Week.

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  8. Would-be carjacker foiled by stick shift <-- That's why I have a stick shift...and it works! My car has never been stolen.

    About the Tampa Bay Buccaneer waking up locked in museum, all I can say is, "Well, Florida..."

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  9. an idiot in the clutch... hahahaha!

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  10. "Woman pleads guilty to having sex so loudly, it shook neighbor's furniture"

    DOH! I was thaaaaat close: I got a sweater for Christmas, when what I really wanted was a screamer or a moaner. ;)

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  11. I keep trying to get locked in a museum after hours but I can't seem to manage it.

    ReplyDelete

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