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Monday, March 21, 2016

Press One for Yes, Two for No


Press One for Yes, Two for No
The other night I got a robot phone call offering me a free vacation if I only answered a few question.  This is the fourth time in a week that I received a similar call and I decided to play along.  I did hear enough of the original spiel to know that my free vacation was only going to be offered if I also bought something. 

I stayed on the line.

“Would you vote for Donald Trump?  Press one for yes, two for no.”

I pressed two.

“Would you vote for Hilary Clinton?  Press one for yes, two for no.”

I pressed two.

“Would you be in favor of higher taxes for the wealthy? Press one for yes, two for no.

I pressed two…it’s my lucky number.

“Please hold for information on your free trip and the opportunity to extend mumble for only a small mumble of mumble.  Thank you.”

I held for about two minutes.

“Hello, this is Anthony your mumble mumble service provider of mumble, how are you today?”

“Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Excuse me?”

“Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

At this point I assumed the phone would be unceremoniously hung up, but no.

“Sir?”

“Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Sir, that’s not how this works.”

“Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Sir, you held for your prize, not to ask me questions.”

“But I want to know, would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Sir, I just work here, I don’t even care about politics!”

“Neither do I, but you called me, now I have my own survey, if you answer the questions you win a free game at Brunswick Bowling Lanes.  “Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Sir, I don't answer your questions."

“Well, suit yourself, you won't win a free game.  I'll give you one more chance.  Would you vote for Donald Trump? Press one for yes, two for no.”

“Have a good day sir.”

I think Anthony must be new to the job.  I’ll bet the next call I get telling me I won something I won’t get past “Would you vote for…”

Rookies!

12 comments:

  1. Luckily I was never on the receiving end of a robo call, since I did not live in a swing state. Worse that telemarketers!!

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  2. I hate all unknown callers who dial my number. I think you were very brave to string the guy along, I would probably say something I shouldn't.

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  3. Good grief I don't know how you lasted so long on this call.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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  4. TWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWOTWO

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  5. How is it that we pay for our phone and service yet others get to invade our privacy and pester us with their sales or promotional pitches. Fortunately, we can read the numbers of incoming calls on our "smart" TV so we don't have to answer the phone if we don't recognize the number.

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  6. Pretty sure that guy is in therapy now. You really twisted his knickers. Well done.

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  7. Good move, Joe!!

    Do you ever get tired of telemarketers calling & yet you’re too polite to just hang up? Me, too. I think I got even some time ago when I was very busy & someone called me with an offer for pre-need funerals. “I told him, “I’m so sorry—I wish you had called last week. I died yesterday!!”

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  8. Heeheehee! Why have i never thought of messing with them like that!

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  9. I am still partial to screaming into the receiver (much to the horror of my sons). But your method will be my second tactic from now on.

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  10. When a telemarketer calls our house I put my two year old on the phone and I tell him it's grandma. Then I hear, "Hi gramma! Hi gramma! Gramma? Hi. Hi. Hi Gramma. What? What you say? What?" and then he holds the phone out to me and says, "Her not there! Her hung up."

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