STUPID HEADLINES 020716
It is time again for
|They waffled a bit on the no adultery thing|
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
Coyotes staring down drivers may be high on mushrooms – Just give them your potato chips and move on dude.
Up to 90 percent of US paper money contains traces of cocaine – Well for God sake don’t give the coyotes any money, they’re high enough.
Church reportedly tells 84-year-old woman she can't be buried next to her husband – Well at least not while she’s still breathing.
Student demands lifetime supply of Kit Kat bars after buying eight lacking wafers – Demands? Or else what?
Former DA testifies Bill Cosby can't be prosecuted – The DA made the announcement right after taking a few sips of medicinal tea that was graciously offered by Mr. Cosby’s attorney.
Donald Trump has reportedly been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize - Actually that is supposed to be “Novel Piece Prize” from the Hair Club for Men.
Mississippi jury summons directs people to call sex hotline – Apparently they have a very different Voir dire process in Mississippi.
Bill Clinton Was On Another Planet Last Night – Well they say men are from Mars, so I assume Bill went to Venus.
North Korea sending balloons filled with cigarette butts into South Korea – Meanwhile, South Korea is leaving flaming paper bags of dog poop on the North Korean border.
Vagina Powerlifter Claims To Know The Secret Of Great Sex – You just have to work on the snatch*.
Colo. Principal bans Peyton Manning jerseys, but Cam Newton gear is OK –
“I don’t understand that rule.”
Black customers sue Denny’s for asking them to prepay for their meal – I’ve had several meals at Denny’s and have never been asked to prepay…probably because I’m old.
*The snatch is the first of two lifts contested in the sport of weightlifting
Come back next week for more:
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!