WOMEN AND “DATES”
|This cranky re-run is from November 2011|
Women put a great deal of importance on dates. They know all the “important” dates, not just Holidays. Women know birthdays, the date someone passed away, and anniversaries of every type. Women remember every anniversary. They remember Wedding anniversaries, first date anniversaries, one month “anniversaries” six month “anniversaries”, the anniversary of their first kiss, there is not a date that women will not remember.
Men remember holidays. They remember their wedding anniversary (well maybe not the first one) and they sometimes even remember their wife’s birthday. Beyond those special days men place very little importance on “dates.”
I sort of know my children’s birthdays. Matt and Mary Beth were born around Labor Day. Labor Day changes every year so remembering the exact date is just not fair. Mike was born at the end of June. Hmmm…thirty days has September, April, May, and (or is it June). Mike was born either June 30 or June 31. Spencer was born in early February, the eighth or ninth. I think. My brother Chris was born one day before my birthday, so that one is easy. My brother Jim was born in the summer….I think the fifteenth of one of the summer months. I am not sure of my mother’s birthday, or my father’s birthday, or their wedding anniversary, or the days they passed away.
Most women are horrified by men’s not knowing these various dates. They associate not knowing or caring to remember dates as not caring about the person. “You don’t care enough to even remember ……..”
I assure you, I love all my children and grandchildren. I know they were born, I remember their first words and their first steps. I remember their successes and their failures. I care. I just don’t remember the dates.
I loved my parents. I just could not tell you when they were born or when they passed away. I was sad when they passed away. I am sad today when I think of them. I don’t remember those dates, I assure you I care.
Women get angry that men forget important dates. The truth is men don’t forget these dates, we never knew them in the first place. When each of my children was born, the moment was seared in my memory. The date? Not so much.
Women, please stop the “date” hysterics. Stop the smugness because you remember the exact date. Caring to remember a date is not a measurement of caring. I will bet any amount of money that my ex-wives could tell you the exact day and time our divorces became official. I have to stop and think of the year. I assure you I care about the event; I just don’t put much importance on the when.