$650,000,000 DOWN THE DRAIN
This week's cranky re-run is from April 2012
Well…$1.00 down the drain, but I was prepared to spend $650 million.
Mrs. Cranky bought a one dollar ticket for the record size lottery this week. We did not win. While we were waiting to lose, we discussed how we were going to spend the money.
I suggested as multi (650) millionaires we would have to move from our comfortable but bourgeois townhouse. Mrs. C disagreed. We had our first fight in four years.
Mrs. C wanted to give large sums of money to brothers, sisters, children, grandchildren, neighbors and friends. I disagreed. We had our second real fight in four years.
Mrs. C wanted a vacation home on the Jersey Shore. I wanted a palace in Bermuda. We had our third real fight in four years.
I wanted a new car for everyday of the week. Mrs. C said those cars would take up too much space in our bourgeois townhouse parking lot, she wanted a giant SUV. We had our fourth real fight in four years.
Fortunately we did not win the $650 million. Our marriage could not have survived the pressure of spending all that money.
Personally, I think she wasted the one dollar on such a foolish pipe-dream.
She wants to buy another ticket next week.
We are now having our fifth real fight in the last four years