THE POWER OF BACON*
For the last four years I have not had real bacon. I have turkey bacon in the morning. It is not bad if you fry it up in extra butter, but it is not bacon. Over the last four years I have gained weight, probably as a result of quitting smoking, but gained weight none the less. Over Christmas, my sister-in-law turned me on to her diet, recommended by many experts. She had recently lost weight on this diet.
Simply put, the diet says no sugar and no carbs. None for a week and from then on only sparing amounts. What can you eat? Fat! You can eat vegetables, lima beans and peas not so much, but string beans, artichoke hearts and leafy stuff, Yes. You can eat nuts. If you are hungry, you can eat, but no sugar and no carbs.
And, I repeat, you can eat fat!
You can eat eggs, and not just the whites. The new experts say the egg yolks are the best for you. People who only eat the whites are missing out on the best and healthiest part of the egg! They now say fat is good! All of this is contrary to common sense which says if you are fat, avoid eating fat. Sometimes common sense is wrong.
Anyway, I am trying this diet. I will soon see if common sense is wrong. While I find out, I do miss sugar and I do miss my potatoes and pasta; but I can now eat bacon.
I have to repeat this. I CAN NOW EAT BACON, real bacon…three, four slices for breakfast with scrambled eggs. Eat until you are not hungry. Just no toast or jam.
I am not hungry.
It seems that sugar and carbs not only turn instantly into stored fat in your body, but they also make you hungry. People today get fat because they eat sugar and carbs which turns to stored fat and makes them hungry so they just keep eating. It is a vicious addiction.
Yes, it turns out that sugar is addictive. Like cigarettes, coffee, and heroin. It is addicting and it kills. At least that is what many experts are now saying.
Point of this is I can now eat bacon, and this has gotten me into trouble.
See every morning I make breakfast and bring orange juice and a pop-up waffle to Mrs. Cranky. Breakfast in bed, imagine that. See the Cranky Old Man is nice sometimes.
Since I started the new diet, I am so excited about being able to eat real bacon; I keep forgetting to bring the waffle and juice up to Mrs. Cranky.
I did this three days in a row.
“Oh boy, did I enjoy breakfast.”
“Oh did you now?”
“Yes, why…OH SHIT, I forgot to bring up your juice and waffle!”
“I’ll go right down and get it.”
“No, that’s all right, I’ll get it later, I’m not really hungry.”
(Why do women do that? Why do they double up on the guilt trip?)
“No, no, I’ll be right back.”
“I don’t want it.”
“YES YOU DO, I’LL GO GET IT! I’m sorry; I don’t know why I forgot.”
(Well I do know, I figured it out, it was the bacon high.”)
“OK, if it makes you happy.”
“I HEARD THAT!”
Oh well, what is a little spat when you get to eat bacon? And so far I’m down 12 pounds.