NEW AND IMPROVED

This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Sunday, September 14, 2014

STUPID HEADLINES 091414


STUPID HEADLINES 091414

It is time once again for
Yes, but then there was also that MURDER thing!
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

 

 This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.

One headline may be completely made up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-doo.  'None of the above' may be a correct answer.

_______________________________

 Forest Service says drop chocolate, add fruit to your s'mores – Wouldn’t that make them L’esses?

Geckos sent into space to have sex come back to Earth ... frozen to death - Well that gives me flashbacks of my first marriage!

Israeli police arrest messianic Jews suspected of running prostitution ring to 'save Israel' – Is that the same group that sold me a toll bridge in Nigeria?

Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 likely downed by 'high-energy objects,' Dutch report says – I’m not an expert, but I am going out on a limb and saying  MISSILE!  Or is it politically incorrect to say missile?

Former Mets executive claims she was fired for being pregnant and unwed – That and she couldn’t hit the curve ball.

DC teacher has sixth-graders compare George Bush to Adolf HitlerHmmm…Hitler murdered 9 million people, and George Bush could not properly pronounce “Nuclear” otherwise they were pretty much alike.

Accused burglar falls asleep next to bag of jewelryNo, no!! That’s CREEP in and snag the jewelry, not SLEEP in with a bag of jewelry.

Birth control shot for men could be here by 2017 – Who knew men could be giving birth in 2017?

Utah teacher accidently shoots self in leg at school – I wonder where she meant to shoot herself in the leg.

Aquarium Bull Shark injures self on glass trying to attack a spectator – Maybe it was the Sealtest ice-cream cone he was holding.

Shoplifting Suspect Used Wheelchair Cart For Getaway – She was caught by a Walmart greeter with a walker.

San Diego cab drivers cry foul over body odor test – San Diego passengers cry over cab drivers foul body odor.

__________________________

Last week’s fake headline was:

Iran bans the sale of “Skittles” calling it “Homosexual Candy.” – And yet they have no problem with blow-up goats.

AND THE WINNERS ARE:


I'm going to go with Iran bans the sale of “Skittles” calling it “Homosexual Candy.”

Have a fabulous Silly Sunday Cranky. My best to Mrs. Cranky. :)

Fishducky, you need to come out of retirement and challenge Sandee!

Dang it Sandee.  Visit Sandee @ http://comedyplus.blogspot.com/ Funny stuff…especially her Silly Sunday.

 


I know strange things come out of Iran but a ban on Skittles? Please say it ain't so

It’s getting harder to fool the Chubby Chatterbox. Drop by Stephens critically acclaimed blog @ http://thechubbychatterbox.blogspot.coml  

 


There are a few that I might have struggled with if I hadn't already seen them earlier. But I'm going to guess the Skittles headline. If it wasn't made up, then I imagine that connecting the candy to gays would be because of the rainbow aspect.. and I think you would have played with that in your remarks. That's my reasoning.. or lack thereof. ;)

WHAT?  Foiled by “Lady Logic!” You can find Hilary at the best photo blog in Canada and other good stuff @


 


I'm going with the Skittles.

I'm not going to admit that I picked that because Sandee and her great track record picked it.
I'm just thinking that Skittles never made it into Iran in the first place.

But if they had made it they would be banned cause of that rainbow thing?  More “Lady Logic!” I’m going to have to have Mrs. C help me with these.

OH and drop on by @ http://my-couch-corner.blogspot.com/ for good thoughts, photos and DRY (cleaner) humor.  Just go, you’ll see.

 

VISIT AND CONGRATULATE ALL OUR  WINNERS, AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR MORE

 

 

 STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!

17 comments:

  1. gonna go for birth control shot for men. why isn't there a shot for women already?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Darn it, I think my comment got eaten. :(

    I just said that, based on this week's headlines, I really worry about the human race.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Here's prob. a first for ya..... I didn't even know what "skittles" are. I had to google it and it could be 3 things..... a candy, a game or a drug. Evidently skittles are very popular but I live in a mushroom cave. ha

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't get a prize because I had to look it up. I only looked it up because I knew I had read every damn one of these headlines since I changed to Google News. Now the question is, what stupid marine animal hurt itself trying to get at a tasty morsel?

    ReplyDelete
  5. I linked you to my Silly Sunday post. I'm also not going to weigh in for a few days. I'll let everyone else pick the fake story first.

    Have a fabulous Silly Sunday Cranky. My very best to Mrs. Cranky. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  6. The Forest Service is a serious organization. They wouldn't.......

    ReplyDelete
  7. Joe, did you see this? http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2253406/Sharks-escape-mall-Shocking-video-shows-moment-33-ton-tank-burst-injuring-15-people.html

    ReplyDelete
  8. What headlines! The Forest Service is accused of many dastardly acts, but tinkering with s'mores has to be the worst.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am going for Birth control shot for men could be here by 2017 :-)

    Have a headlinetastic week :-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm picking Cold Dead Space Geckoes as fake. That's because I don't want it to be true. As if it isn't hard enough for them to get in and out of their little gecko space suits to get busy...now they have to remember to adjust the thermostat, too?

    Since when did the Forest Service get a cooking show? My uncle worked for the Forest Service, and he never told me how to improve my s'mores. Still...it sounds like something they might do in one of their outposts where tourists roam around with their kids.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I pick the Forest Service recommendation.

    The headline of messianic Jews suspected of running prostitution ring to 'save Israel' made me think of the line, "...just close your eyes and think of England." Hehehe.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Popped back in to see how everyone was doing. I'll post my answer perhaps tomorrow.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am going with "Birth control shot for men could be here by 2017." It is already here they are called rubbers.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I think the forest service one is bogus. I know chocolate left around probably isn't good for animals but who in their right mind would leave chocolate unattended?

    ReplyDelete
  15. Gonna go for the wheel-chair bound shoplifter!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'm going with 'Aquarium Bull Shark injures self on glass trying to attack a spectator.'

    Have a fabulous day Cranky. My best to Mrs. Cranky. ☺

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!