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Sunday, August 17, 2014

STUPID HEADLINES 081714


STUPID HEADLINES 081714

It is time once again for
And that was a surprise?
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

 

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.

 

One headline may be completely made up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-doo.  'None of the above' may be a correct answer.

 

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Ants May Boost CO2 Absorption Enough to Slow Global Warming – But can they counteract all the methane produced by the Uncles?

Rory McIlroy Says Breaking Up With Caroline Wozniacki Has Made Him Better At Golf – Now every golfer in the world wants to date Caroline Wozniaki so they can break up with her!

Exotic dancers protest topless at church- Attendance soars!

Chicken crossing road blocks traffic in Oregon – But why was it crossing the road?

Kenyan who offered 40 goats and 20 cows to Clinton as dowry for Chelsea killed by elephant – Oh sure, blame the Republicans!

Ukraine-bound Russian convoy stuck amid doubts over route – “I’m telling you it says turn left after the white Лечение аэрозолями!”

'Pregnant Man' Has Right To Divorce Wife – He is upset because he doesn’t think the baby is his.

Mahiedine Mekhissi-Benabbad stripped of gold for impromptu strip – So now I guess he won’t become a household name.

Penguin interrupts wedding on Virginia Beach – I guess it was a formal wedding.

Maine men charged with digging up 2 relatives – Big deal, I’ve dug up a bunch of friends on Facebook.

809-pound tiger shark fed to underprivileged Texans – “Here is your knife, fork, snorkel and swim fins, bon apitito and good luck!”

Los Angeles weighs cash incentive in bid to boost voter turnout – And a bonus if you vote for the right person.

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Last week’s fake headline was:

Somerville man hit by car is in grave condition – Well not yet, but if he stops breathing then yes.

And the winners are:

NOBODY!!

 

Come back next week for more

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!

10 comments:

  1. i'm gonna pick the elephant one.

    good going on the stump last week! slipped one by us!

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  2. I'll go with penguin interrupts wedding on Virginia Beach. The rest of the stories are believable, but the penguin one just doesn't sound believable.

    Have a fabulous Silly Sunday Cranky. ☺

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  3. Usually I've heard of at least one or two of your unbelievable headlines. This week, nothing rings a bell. And they all sound fake. So...eenie, meenie, miney, mo...the Kenyan with the dowry.

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  4. Penguin. It must have had quite a swim.

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  5. I'm picking the Oregon chicken road-crosser. Chickens are flighty. I think it would scurry away before the road was blocked for long.

    The penguin could have been a part of the wedding ceremony, I suppose, and headed for the ice sculpture.

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Kenyan who offered 40 goats and 20 cows to Clinton as dowry for Chelsea killed by elephant"

    If he'd made the offer in 2001 when the Clinton's were leaving the White House all impoverished (according to Hillary), they might have taken it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm going with the ants since global warming is a myth and in any case its Obama' fault.

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  8. I am going with the 40 goats and 20 cows one. Maybe it is a down payment for Hillary's Presidential campaign.

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  9. I am gonna go with the one about the Kenyan man

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  10. The penguin seems like a good choice, even though I have a record of making bad choices in the game. I hope you have a great week.

    ReplyDelete

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