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Sunday, November 17, 2013

STUPID HEADLINES 111713


STUPID HEADLINES 111713

It is time once again for:
Clearly this should have read Dear
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

 

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.


One headline is completely made up.  Guess the fake and win a mention.

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White Republican wins Houston election with campaign that implied he's black – “Yo yo yo…I never say I be black.”

Factory fire causes nationwide knish shortage – Oh  kno! I have  knothing  to knosh on without a knish!

Spanish pianist faces possible jail time for practicing at home – How do you get to Leavenworth? Practice,  practice,  practice.

Boston bombing suspect wants to lift prison restrictions – Yeah well, we kinda WANTED him to NOT BLOW PEOPLE UP!

Church leaders in Detroit push 'Thou shalt not kill' message – Moving up from number six, and now right behind “No Gods before me” is “Thou shalt not kill!”

Secrets Behind Victoria’s $10 Million Fantasy Bra – Silicon!

Three year old daredevil jumps 27 Tinker Toys with a tricycle – “Tot Tops Toys on Trike!”

Bill Maher tells Boston: 'Your city was not leveled by Godzilla' – Comedian points out to the world that there have been bigger tragedies than the Boston Marathon bombing.  Thank you Bill; and your point is?

U.S. Oil Prices Hit Five-Month Low as Supplies Swell – Congress calls for an investigation into price un-gouging.

Iran's culture minister defends Facebook, says it's not a 'criminal application' – “Chopping off heads of infidels”…like us on Facebook!

Sweden orders fire alarms in hotel made of ice – FIRE!! Quick, throw some building on the building!

 
 

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Prehistoric bones discovered in cavern

Last week’s fake headline was:

 

Irradiated corn plants produce self-popping corn – They could make quite a mess if not harvested in time.

 

AND THE WINNERS ARE:

           TexWisGirl   @ http://run-a-roundranch.blogspot.com/ said...

i'm going for microwaved popcorn this week.

 

            Val   @ http://unbaggingthecats.blogspot.com/  said...

Give me the fake self-popping corn. I'll be standing at the edge of the field with self-churning cows, selling butter to the on-lookers.

            Pixel Peeper   @ http://my-couch-corner.blogspot.com/ said...

My bet is on the irradiated self-popping corn. This (if true) could create quite a ruckus if it happened at night!

            lime   @ http://houseoflime.blogspot.com/ said...

           i think it has to be the self-popping corn
               
             Check out these fine blogs and congratulate them.
         
                                                                                                                                                                                                                   There is no Fishducky award this week for lack of funny comments.  It seems everyone was too annoyed with the Tom Cruise comment about acting being harder than soldiering in Afghanistan.    

 

In Cruise's defense I think his quote was taken out of context and there may have been a sarcastic eye roll not reported.  He’s still an ass but…

10 comments:

  1. i'm going for 3 yr old evel knievel.

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  2. Are you sure that only ONE headline is fake? This week, they all sound made up.

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  3. I am going with Sweden orders fire alarms in hotel made of ice. I just want it to be fake.

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  4. I am torn between the trike tot and Godzilla Maher. Eeny meeny...put my money on Bill Maher. I think he would be talking up the significance of the bombing, not belittling it. Unless he's the first leopard to change his spots.

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  5. Oil prices. Because I have not the faintest idea if they have in fact gone down or stayed the same or even gone up in the US. But here in Aus, they're still ridiculously high.

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  6. Congress calls for a hearing on oil price un-gouging? I don't think so.

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  7. I've definitely missed reading your headlines! I am going with the first one, The person pretending to be black because I don't think anyone would do that in this day and age for fear a visit from Oprah and her crying fowl bandwagon!

    ReplyDelete
  8. i think it's the tinker toy story. i don't think a kid today has any idea what a tinker toy is.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Tom Cruise IS totally an ass, but at least he's short.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I would "like" to think that the Iranian fb head chopping is fake, but will go with the Swedish ice fire alarms.

    ReplyDelete

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