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Friday, September 13, 2013

Cindy Crawford’s Lineage


Cindy Crawford’s Lineage
 

Mrs. Cranky and I recently watched an interesting program which is promoted by Ancestry.com.  This program traces the ancestry of celebrities and surprise, surprise they all have interesting and famous relatives.

This particular episode traced the heritage of Model Cindy Crawford.  The show paid particular attention to Cindy’s “Great Grandfather X10.” Her relative was noble and bold and a hero in the French Revolution.  Cindy was ecstatic to find “that this little mid-west girl came from such fine stock.  I would never have guessed it!”

But wait…there is more!

Further research found that Cindy’s “Great Grandfather X30” was Charlemagne.   That’s right, The Charlemagne, King of the Franks, King of Italy and ruler of Western Europe in the 800’s.

Cindy was in awe of the fact that she was a descendant of a man who was once basically the most powerful ruler in the world.  That is pretty spectacular news.  Cindy was so proud.

But then,

Charlemagne died in 814 leaving behind 18 (acknowledged) children from multiple wives and mistresses.  Now Cindy’s Great Grandfather X10 of whom she was so proud would have been one of one thousand and twenty-four Great Grandfathers X10 in her lineage.   Charlemagne is Cindy’s Great Grandfather X30! 

I'm not sure of the math, but with 30 generations to get to Cindy, I am going to take a guess that good old Charlie, Emperor of Western Europe, is probably one of one-billion Great Grandfathers X30 that can claim a bit of Cindy Crawford DNA.  After Charlie's 18 (acknowledged) children from multiple wives and mistresses and forty generations later, Cindy is probably not really so special. 

Yes Cindy, you come from some mighty powerful stock.  You probably share that heritage with 98% of anyone living today who is at least 1/100 Caucasian!

I’ll bet there are a more then a few deadbeats, murderers, child molesters, serial killers, fakes, frauds, and abject failures in your lineage that Ansestry.com just happened to gloss over.

                                                 
                                               

The resemblance is uncanny!

 

Still, it is an interesting show.
And ain't my cousin Cindy hot!

10 comments:

  1. I don't want to brag, but according to the Bible I'm descended from Adam & Eve!!

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  2. oh my gosh you are TOO funny! "Ain't my cousin Cindy hot?!!" you have me laughing this morning :)

    I've been wanting to go on Ancestory.com to see where (or who, rather) I come from. But I'm afraid of what (or who!) I might find. I'm mostly German. What if I'm related to Hitler in some way? Yeeesh.

    You know, I can see how ancestry would be recorded with nobility and people of means way back when... but what if you were from poor peasants who lived in the woods and no one recorded all the births? then how do you search? do you just come to a dead end in the lineage?

    Do you remember that one movie with Mel Brooks called Defending Your Life (one of my favorite movies, by the way - so funny) There is this one seen where he goes to The Museum of Past Lives (or some title like that) where they can see on a movie screen who they were in the past. I wish we had something like that, but it would show our ancestors, going from the most recent to the oldest...and it would just go back and back and back until I guess we got to Adam and Eve (or some single-celled organism, if that's the case -- hey, we would get THE answer that way, wouldn't we? It would stop all the debates and arguments!) Anyway, yeah, that would be so cool if there was something like that.

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  3. ha ha. maybe she's my cousin, too!

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  4. I hope Cindy isn't my cousin because that would spoil several of my fantasies.

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  5. 'Tis better to be an ancestor.

    Someday, someone will boast that YOU were their tenth great-grandfather!

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  6. Joe, just watching the news... bummer on the fire! all that money spent to rebuild the boardwalk... and they suspect arson? sad

    Cheetah is my 10th cousin ~ I quit searching after learning that.

    hope you're far far away from the fire

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  7. My brother-in-law is into genealogy and has done a lot of research. He even traveled to Sweden and met some of the distant relatives. At some point, he went back so far that he was pretty sure that Hagar the Horrible appeared in the family tree.

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  8. Ever heard of the Green Mountain Vault? I find that more interesting than the TV show. Just the facility itself boggles the mind.

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  9. LOL! I suppose they could be honest about it, but it wouldn't make for as interesting a show.

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