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Sunday, August 18, 2013

NO MORE STUPID HEADLINES


NO MORE STUPID HEADLINES

 
Due to a lack of interest, last week was the swan song for Cranky’s Stupid Headlines of the week.  This weekly post has been my least viewed every week for months.  The fake headline contest is only participated in by a handful of readers so I have decided to pull the plug on Stupid Headline Sunday.

 

 

 

Oh hell, the stupid headlines crack me up so for my own enjoyment I will continue with:

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY 081813
 

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments. 

One headline is completely made up.  Guess the fake and win a mention.

 

 

 

 

Al Roker oversleeps, misses early morning weather show – Big deal!  I oversleep and miss that show every day.

 

I’m a guy again! ABC newsman who switched genders wants to switch back OK, this is almost exactly last week’s fake headline.  It is dated 8-6, so last week’s fake headline:

California man who thought he was a lesbian gets sex change   He then wanted to change his mind, but brain transfers are illegal in California.

WASN’T FAKE AFTERALL!!  - I will still award a mention to FlyFshrGrl.

 


 

Tennessee judge rules infant's name must be changed from 'Messiah' – Judge changed babies name to Sal, middle name Vation.

 

Testicle-biting fish invading Denmark, authorities warn – I am feeling a new hit movie…“Castrato!”

 

Florida woman begs on street for bigger boobs – Oh big deal, I’ve been begging for bigger boobs since I was 13.

 

California law allows transgender students to pick bathrooms, sports teams they identify with – Sadly, this is NOT the fake headline!

 

New line of cups and straws detect date rape drugs – It seems like they just got rid of pantyhose, and now this!

 

Archeologist finds missing link…and then loses it! – He is now heading an expedition to find the missing, missing link.

 

Anthony Weiner's sext partner: Conservative women 'self loathing' like 'Fox News fembots' – Words of wisdom from a 23 year old bimbo who was in love with a phone-sex asshole who looks like his face is in a wind tunnel and texts pictures of his penis to multiple women.  My kind of feminist!

 

Iran bans 'catwalk model' councilwoman from office over her looks – So Iran bans women from office if they are attractive…that is completely unfair to .05% of the population!

 

Spoon in underwear saving youths from forced marriage – Not what my parents called “spooning,” just a new way to prevent getting “forked.”





 

 

 

There was only one person who correctly identified last week’s fake headline.

As it turns out, the fake headline was not really fake at all, which explains why fishducky was confused.

 

The person who correctly identified the fake headline which was actually not a fake was:

 

            FlyFshrGrl said...

It's really difficult to believe that only one of these is a fake. Really?

I'm going to go with the California man getting a sex change--it just doesn't make sense

Visit FlyFsherGrl  @ http://flyfishon.blogspot.com/   for interesting fishing stories, information, tips and great pictures.

11 comments:

  1. "Testicle-biting fish invading Denmark"

    Things to do today: 1. Amend vacation Bucket List

    No more stupid headlines? Noooooooo! Don't you dare! This is the highlight of my Sunday. (Says a lot about my Sunday's huh? ;)

    S

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  2. I'm a faithful reader, Joe, but not a faithful headline picker. Truth is, I've googled most of them and encountered some variation on the story, even if it was the cheesiest of tabloids.

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  3. you might have more participants if you did this during the week when [some] people are at work.

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  4. not sure what the spoon in underwear thing is about... i know quite a few of these are real. i'm going with missing link...

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  5. I'm confused again--I think they're ALL real!!

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  6. I'll have to put my money on The Absentminded Archaeologist as fake. Though it might make a good Disney movie. More appropriate than the underwear spoon.

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  7. I don't know which one is fake, but the article I read placed the testicle-eating relatives of the piranha in Sweden. How those tropical fish stay alive in water that cold is a mystery.

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  8. Nice joke with not having the stupid headlines. I look forward to reading them each Sunday. I could not figure the fake one out last week.

    This week, I will go with, Archeologist finds missing link…and then loses it! I am sure if they ever find missing link they would make sure they did not lose it.

    The testicle-biting fish story, I heard a similar story this week but it was in Michigan or somewhere around the Great Lakes, I think. The fish bites because they mistaking them as nuts when guys are skinny dipping. Safer to wear a Speedo.

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  9. I have no idea... but the Miss Southampton headline set the funny mood for the rest of the post.

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  10. Don't stop headline Sundays! I love them! And I'm guessing missing link guy, too.

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  11. Whew! I almost went out and bought some antidepressants before I realized you were just faking us out about shutting down SHS. I'm really hoping that is NOT the fake headline. Hilarity of this quality is so difficult to find!!

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