THE WORST DRIVERS EVER
Mrs. Cranky does most of the driving in our relationship. Mrs. Cranky is one-half Italian. When Mrs. Cranky is behind the wheel, she becomes one-hundred percent Italian. She is full of attitude. She goes from a mild mannered, meek, and non-confrontational sweet lady to Tony Soprano. When Mrs. Cranky is behind the wheel everyone is an asshole. When the other driver is behind the wheel of a BMW, Mrs. Cranky is always right.
What makes every driver of every BMW think he is king of the friggin road?
Is it because they can afford a $35,000+ car? I don’t think so, as there are plenty of more expensive car on the road with non-asshole drivers behind their expensive wheels.
Is it because BMW’s are just sooo powerful and maneuverable that they naturally bring out the NASCAR racer from the owners? I’ve seen faster cars driven slower.
When a car roars by me at 20 mph over the speed limit it is always a BMW. When a car weaves in and out of traffic on the turnpike, it is always a BMW. When a car cuts you off, won’t let you merge, tailgates, or refuses to hit its dimmer at night it is always a BMW.
A BMW owner does not own a BMW, he owns a “BEEMER.” That makes him a Pompous Asshole!
Got a lot of money, but not enough to buy a real luxury car? Buy a BEEMER. Got a lot of money, but not enough to buy a real high performance car? Buy a BEEMER. Got a BEEMER and need get the attention of the rest of the world? Drive like an asshole.
“Damn that car is fast; damn you can cut people off on a dime. What kind of car is that; a BMW?”
*BMW owners who are readers of “Cranky Old Man” are naturally exempt from the above opinion.